I, like most other people in this world, can be mean sometimes (shocking, I know). Unsurprisingly, this side of me usually comes out when I get into a fight or disagreement with someone. I think it’s human nature to try and hurt someone who we believe has hurt us. However, I’ve discovered over the course of many years and many arguments that when I’m cruel to someone, I’m the one who ends up feeling terrible. That’s why I have made the promise to myself that even when I’m angry, I will think about what I’m saying and to articulate how I’m really feeling without being unnecessarily cruel.
Another instance where people find justification for their meanness is in the name of humor. Don’t get me wrong: I’m a huge fan of sardonic humor and my style of making jokes usually involves lightheartedly making fun of my friends and family members. However, there are some people who seem to take joy in ridiculing others and tearing them down. Time after time, I have seen and heard “comedians” insult others (I’m looking at you, Nicole Arbour) and then justifying it as “comedy.” This isn’t comedy. It’s called being a terrible person and then trying to justify your actions. There’s no problem with making fun of people in order to call out, for example, systematic injustices and issues with society. John Oliver and Jon Stewart are both excellent examples of this. While they do call others out and ridicule them, they do so to illustrate problems in our society, rather than for the sole purpose of being mean.
It may sound hokey to say we should all be nice to one another all the time. I get it. I’m not nice all the time and if I were, that would probably mean I was a robot with not other emotions. What I am saying, however, is that being nice to each other whenever we can truly helps to make the world a better place. I would much rather be considered boring and nice than hilarious and cruel.
This may seem difficult at times, but I believe it’s a relatively simple change to make. When you’re talking with someone, consider their feelings before you say something that could be hurtful. While this doesn’t mean you have to stop joking around with your friends, it means you should think about your words and the impact they could have on people. It means that, before you make a joke, you should consider whether or not your words will ultimately have a positive impact, rather than one that is destructive. It may take practice, but I believe if each of us takes these little steps, we can start a “kindness revolution.”