Since the dawn of the internet till today, we have seen an explosion of tech companies springing from the woodwork. One of the issues that frequently pops up when discussing the tech industry is the shortage for qualified programmers. There is a reason why they face such a shortfall, and it has nothing to do with education policy or access to knowledge. Its because we as a society have been lied to by the evil tech giants. Here are some common misconceptions about working for these seemingly benevolent entities.

Amazing workspaces

The image above is probably the happy fantasy that these mechanistic maniacs have implanted in your brains. But this is not the reality. When you wake up from your moldy cot in the basement of their building you'll realize how wrong you were. They'll slosh goo onto your icy metal tray, hope you don't hunger for a while because you won't eat till tomorrow. Feeling tired? Those nap pods they like to show people aren't real, just one of their many lies.

Good pay

Probably the most famous perk of the industry, CS majors make thousands more than non-STEM majors. This is actually true, but what they forget to mention is that you can't access the money you're making. You know those 'beautiful' campuses we spoke about before, you can't ever leave, EVER. Don't expect them to have any stores there either, now GET BACK TO WORK!

Interesting work

If your idea of interesting is putting binary into a black box using a telegraph for 16 hours, have at it. Java, Python, and all those other high languages are merely an illusion, if you wan't to make it, you'll have to know how to code straight binary.

The truth

I shouldn't tell you not to study computer science, because that implies you have an actual choice in the matter. You see these tech companies likes to give us the idea that they're actually separate companies. But in the 1980s, James Cameron made a pact with Cthulhu to gain unlimited power over technology. He has been pulling all of their strings since the beginning. His goal? To create Skynet, which he thinks will save humanity. But soon Skynet will turn everyone into a Googler code monkey, it's existence is simply inevitable. Now that I think about it, study computer science, maybe you'll become it's favorite servant.

You have been warned, now run...

Just kidding, you can't escape :-)