Finding yourself can be a real struggle, especially during the transition from high school to college.

Whether you’re outgoing, shy, athletic, artistic, etc., finding the right friend group in college is really difficult if you do not have a solid sense of self. How are you supposed to find others that are similar to you if you don’t even know who you are, right?? These tips have certainly helped me a ton with finding myself over the summer and I’m definitely going into Sophomore year as a completely different person but I wish I had been told these before I started college!

1. Never be embarrassed of the things that interest you.

There will always be people that are interested in the same kinds of things as you and being yourself can really help in creating a happy lifestyle when living on your own. (This is a great way to become part of a community as well!)

2. Surround yourself with positive people.

This one was HUGE for me and I didn’t figure this out until summer going into my sophomore year. If you surround yourself with negative energy, you will be so much more likely to be stressed out and upset. Surround yourself with people that make you laugh and create a light-hearted atmosphere for yourself.

3. BE CONFIDENT.

Easier said than done, I know, but confidence attracts confidence and if you exert a vibe that shows that you love yourself, you are more likely to attract people who love themselves too.

4. Relationships aren’t everything.

Who cares if that boy didn’t kiss you at that party last night? Focus on having fun with your girl friends. You have the rest of your life to be tied down by the man of your dreams, go crazy while you can.

5. Force yourself to go to the library.

I know it’s hard sometimes, especially when the library is 3 miles from your dorm, but I promise you that you’ll feel so much better about yourself when your work is done.

6. It’s a Tuesday night and your friends are going out?

Go with them. As long as you don’t have an exam the next day, it really won’t do much harm. Work is forever, but college ends. Make the memories while you can.

7. Spend time alone.

Being comfortable hanging out by yourself is such an important attribute to acquire and honestly, who doesn’t like to have their own space?

8. If it doesn’t interest you, don’t do it.

If you don’t like it, don’t wear it. If they don’t make you a better person, don’t waste time with them.

9. Sometimes no makeup, a messy bun, and sweatpants can actually make you feel really good.

It’s okay to have some lazy days, but don’t get stuck in this routine.

10. Treat yourself to some ice cream because… why not?

You deserve it. Maybe throw in some sprinkles too.

11. Talk to people.

Even on days that you don’t feel like it, or you can’t find the nerves to. Talking to strangers and putting yourself out there makes you feel a hundred times better and you may even find some of your best friends that way.

12. DO NOT GO HOME WITH A BOY.

It’s college. If he’s asking you to go home with him the first time you meet, he doesn’t like you. He doesn’t care about you. You may be less lonely in the moment, but you will regret it in the morning. The walk of shame is a VERY real thing and it can make you feel so bad about yourself. Fight the temptation. I promise you you’ll feel better in the morning.

13. Chase away negative thoughts.

I know, again, easier said than done but mindset really is everything and thinking positively about yourself can really change your life.

14. Don’t pay attention to the drama.

If someone doesn’t like you, that’s their problem because you like you and that’s all that matters.

15. Love your friends, love your family, and most importantly, love yourself.