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Reflect On What You Desire

Briefly reflecting on the past can make you realize it was not all wasted time.

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Reflect On What You Desire
Savannah Ballenger

Entering into my senior year of college as an undergraduate, I consider now to be an excellent time to reflect upon the past four years, yes four years with another year to go. So much has happened over this short span of time; some major life events and some just bumps in the road. While another reflection story may not seem original, I feel like mine is relatable and unique.

When I entered the University of West Georgia I was, fresh out of high school, living on campus and working a part-time job while remaining a full-time student. I felt like I had everything figured out. My major entering into college was pre-psychology and I planned only staying at my local college for my core before moving on to what I thought was bigger and better things. The feeling quickly evaporated the moment I entered my first psychology class. It was a lecture class, and the teacher came in looking like a seventies hippie, no lie. I spent the first few weeks trying to engulf myself into the class and doing every assignment to my best ability and then some. With the withdrawal date quickly approaching, I knew something needed to change, and that something needed to be huge!

One day walking back to the dorms from class, I called my sister crying. She helped me understand that if I was unhappy with just the class, I would remain unhappy moving forward. I spent many hours in deep thought about what possibly could make me happy pursuing as a career for my future. I thought about what had made me happy growing up, and I knew without a doubt that single thing had been school. I played teacher growing up, I loved going to class every day and nothing brought me joy quite like school. So okay, I knew I wanted to teach and my ultimate goal was to teach English in college, but I wanted to teach high school as well. I quickly changed my major to English with a concentration in education. My new plan was set and put into motion.

However, life had a different plan in store. I got pregnant. Obviously, this was an unplanned pregnancy, but nonetheless I was excited to be a mom, scared to death, but excited. I knew things were going to change. I knew I could no longer quit my part-time job. Instead, I asked for more hours! I moved back home and began planning the life of a single mom. I never put my education on hold, just the plans of moving off to college after finishing my core.

With my baby’s due date quickly approaching, juggling work, prenatal visits and still school, I moved forward with life. I took a semester off of college to welcome my baby into the world. People scorned me telling me, “You won’t go back to college after you have that baby.” I knew I had so much to prove, not only to others, but to myself as well. I had not only myself to look after, but now a beautiful baby girl.

We entered into our own little plan. I went back to school to continue my dreams with a goal to graduate with a job that could support us both. While English still holds my love, the plan has once again changed. I am going for my dream full force. I dropped my concentration and am planning to attend graduate school the following semester after graduation. There have been so many changes in these past few years with the revision of plans and bringing life into the world, but I want to be able to look back in the future and know I conquered my fears and never let myself down. I want my daughter to be proud and see I did it and so can she. These years at the University of West Georgia have created new inspiration and a new outlook for myself. The beautiful, yet sometimes overwhelming, campus continues to mold me every day. The moment I receive my diploma I'll know I did it, on my own maybe, but it will have definitely been worthwhile.

Fall is a season. Some also see fall as a lifestyle, a fashion movement and as well as pretty colors. I see fall as a time of creativity and rebirth. Fall, to me, awakens so many options for one's future because it is often the time people return to school. As I enter into the fall semester of my senior year, it presents a chance to reflect, but also to embark on another amazing adventure to engage in my education and make my dreams come true.

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