People often put others before themselves without really even thinking about it. It has almost become second nature, especially when it comes to friends and family. We often get so caught up in helping others that we forget to take care of ourselves. And that's not okay. It's important to find a balance.
Putting yourself first does not mean that you don't care about others. It is not selfish to love yourself or to make your own happiness a priority. Sometimes you have to be your own hero and save yourself, rather than focusing on others and hoping someone else will come along to help you. Sometimes you have to do what is best for you and your life, not what is best for everyone else.
You are allowed to put yourself first. If people don't understand that you need to do that every now and then, then they are often not worth your time. You are allowed to terminate toxic relationships, whether that be a boyfriend/girlfriend, friends, or even family. Distancing yourself from the negative in your life will lead you to being happier.
You are allowed to walk away from people who have hurt you. If someone hurts you, then they are not worth your time and energy. Instead, turn that time and energy into focusing on you. If someone in your life makes you unhappy more than they make you happy, then it is okay to let them go. This does not mean that you stop loving them, it means that you are putting your own happiness first. It's okay to invest in yourself.
You don't have to defend or explain your decisions with anyone. It's YOUR decision. It's YOUR life. It's YOUR happiness. The decision may not be easy, but the right one hardly ever is. But in the end, if it improves your life and increases your happiness, then it is the right decision.
It is never selfish to put yourself first. It's necessary.