When I first signed up for sorority recruitment, I didn't know what to expect. Being a sophomore, I knew a little bit about sororities and Greek life, but I was close with anyone who had gone through the long process to meet all the sororities and finally, at the end, get a bid (hopefully). So when it started, I was confused, nervous and excited.

After the first day, when you meet all the sororities, everyone wrote their initial list of preference. At this time, all the sororities did the same thing with all 600+ of us hopeful new members. I felt pretty good about my top choices, meaning I felt like they would probably list me too. Earlier that day, they talked to us about how "not everyone will get their top choice" and how "not everyone will even get a bid". While this scared me, I brushed it off because I felt confident enough in myself to hear back from all my top choices each day and finally have that hard decision on the last day of recruitment between my two favorite sororities. But, things don't always go as planned, and this was definitely one of those things.

Day two rolled around, I got up in the morning, and was so excited to see who had asked for me back. Everyone opened their schedules at the same time to see who chose them. It seemed like everyone around me was happy and excited and felt great. I was the complete opposite. I had gotten one sorority back, Phi Sigma Sigma. This was one of the last sororities that I put down on my preference sheet. I was totally devastated. At this point, I started choking up and felt like I needed to cry. I wanted to drop out, I wanted to never come back. I felt like I was worthless and that nobody liked me. I couldn't believe that this happened to me, that I was the one who they mentioned the day before.

So, I left. I went to my dorm room and cried, wondering what was wrong with me and what I had done wrong. I didn't want to talk to my friends because I was embarrassed to say what had happened. I didn't want to talk to my mom because I didn't even know what to say. I avoided almost everyone.

Somehow, I was convinced by my recruitment counselor and by my boyfriend to keep going with the process and to give Phi Sigma Sigma a chance. I went to meet with them later that day, and continued to be called back each day of recruitment. The more sisters I met, the better I felt about it. But still, at bid day, when it was obvious who had chosen me, I wasn't sure about them, or even sororities in general.

Bid day was awkward. I barely knew anyone besides a few girls I had met during recruitment and one of my close friends who ended up in Phi Sig as well. The first couple weeks in it, I felt like I didn't know if it was where I belonged. I struggled to really connect with anyone well, while it seemed like everyone else was starting to make friends within our new member group. But, I kept trying and stuck with it. I tried being more social, going to dinner with some people or just trying to talk to them whenever I could.

I don't think it was until maybe two or three weeks ago that I started really knowing that Phi Sigma Sigma was something I wanted to follow through with. I started to form better friendships with some people, I learned more about my sorority, I saw how everyone interacted with each other, and in the blink of an eye, it was big/little reveal day. I found out I had a twin, and I found out I got the best big ever. Plus, I gained a new family. Since that day especially, Phi Sig has really grown on me. I'm getting even closer with my new member group, getting closer with older sisters, and making a ton of memories that I'll always remember.

Yes, Phi Sigma Sigma was not my initial first choice. It was not something I was even sure I wanted to be in until recently. But, that does not change how I feel about it now. I now know, because of all my wonderful sisters and all the friendships I've been forming and all the fun times I've had over the past couple months, that I am in the right place. I am very thankful that Phi Sigma Sigma continued to see something in me during recruitment and that they chose me to be a part of their sisterhood.

Sometimes, the bad things that happen end up not being bad at all. Sometimes, they end up leading you right where you were always meant to be. And Phi Sig is definitely where I'm meant to be.