As human beings, we have this immense need for affection and validation. We search for this kind of attention from those around us. Those who manage to fill our emptiness—those who make us feel comfortably accompanied by their presence within our lives—are the people we latch on to the most. These are the people we call close friends, best friends, loved ones, etcetera. Although some are not chosen, such as family, their presence still influences us and serves as a sense of security and happiness within our lives.
We begin to form—whether we want to admit it or not—a characteristic of dependency within us. Dependency on what these people make us feel in our daily lives. Unconsciously creating a stronger connection with them. The feeling is truly indescribable but it is almost certain that you, reader, have felt this way once or twice in your life. It is an amazing feeling, knowing that this person holds affection for you, regardless of your flaws and mistakes. We can’t help but feel comforted and overjoyed with these special bonds we create throughout our lives.
But as the course of time has its natural effects on our lives and life as we know it, our surroundings transform like autumn leaves. Unfortunately, many of these relationships we grow so fondly of begin to deteriorate—by natural causes, forces out of our control and sometimes even for our own good. Separation: the cause of our worst experiences, our biggest regrets and our greatest heartaches. Separation taints our souls with longing and despair. Separation creates many of the feelings most of us are scared to admit it and hear ourselves say it out loud.
The painting Separation (1894) by Edvard Munch, Norwegian painter in the late 20th century precisely conveys those feelings of detachment and the affect that linger from it. The painting draws focus on the human figures—one, dressed in white (a woman) which seems to be leaning toward the opposite direction from the second figure, who is man dressed in all black. His hand is highlighted with red outlines placed over his heart. Near his feet, burning shrub seems to be engulfing or reflecting to the immense pain he seems to be in by the expression on his face.
A rush of sadness and a sense of recognition flows through one’s body upon stumbling across this painting. We can clearly feel the agony within Munch’s in the painting. In his life, he faced great tragedies, starting with the death of his mother and soon after his sister. And although he never married, Munch felt this deep connection with those he loved and his art itself. Now we as viewers can feel all the emotions Munch felt…and translate and inject them into our own experiences with separation. Whether it be the loss of a loved one like Munch experienced, a heavy break from a toxic relationship or a disastrous heartbreak, every hello inevitably ends with a goodbye; understanding this, but most importantly accepting it is what makes everything so much more difficult.
The human experience of separation allows us to cherish what we have, and although it brings about the many obstacles and their consequences, it gives us the opportunity to find a new beginning and start the cycle once again. Separation can make the heart grow fonder. Separation allows us to feel immense emotions at their purest and strongest. Munch successfully translates this through his work. The tribulations of separation hurt but make us stronger and give us an irreplaceable experience to start over.
“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until hour of our separation.” –Khalil Gibran