Recently, I have started getting into the habit of trying to watch at least one TED Talk each week. This week, I stumbled across a talk titled "The Power of Vulnerability" delivered by researcher Brené Brown (I would highly recommend clicking the link and watching this video if reading this article sparks your interest). Vulnerability is so interesting because it is something that basically everyone will struggle with during their lifetime. But this got me thinking, what does it mean to be truly vulnerable, and why is it so hard?
Well first of all, what is vulnerability? When you really sit down and think about it, there is really no clear-cut answer, but let me try my best. To be vulnerable means to be the rawest, most open version of yourself. It means to not be afraid of hurt, judgment, pain, or as mentioned in the TED Talk, shame. It means to have no guard up to protect yourself, but rather to let everything from your world grace you. When you think about it like that, it makes a lot of sense why being vulnerable would be scary and difficult.
Vulnerability is something that I think as a race, we lack. We have arrived at this place where we try to portray our lives as perfect. We cover up our flaws on our faces or within our personalities. We only put our most shining moments on Facebook and Instagram with an attractive filter and flattering lighting. We hesitate to say the "I love yous" and "I'm sorries" first because we don't want to come off as weak or fragile. We wonder deep down if we are worthy.
But here is what Brown found out: those who know that they are worthy of things like love and belonging are the most vulnerable.
And that is what we all need to start striving for.
So I dare you (and myself) to be vulnerable, which is really asking you to be brave. You can't selectively choose what you feel and what you don't. If you decide to block out the bad, you can't really expect to take in all of the good. In choosing to keep out the sadness and the hurt, you are also preventing yourself from feeling every ounce of happiness that you are indeed worthy of. So I dare you to say exactly how you feel. I dare you to apologize first. I dare you to say "I love you" first. I dare you to let go of the grudge first. I dare you to be what you would consider the truest form of yourself. You never know what good can come to you if you be just a little bit more vulnerable.