Ernest Hemingway writes his short story, “The End of Something,” about a young couple who has lost feelings for each other. The short story is interesting as a whole, but I want to talk about one of Nick’s lines: “It isn’t fun anymore. Not any of it.” We can all relate to this at some level, male or female, because at some point in a relationship, it’s just not fun.
Those experienced with relationships can read this line, and say, “Duh!” Relationships aren’t supposed to be fun all the time! They’re hard, they take time, commitment, and maturity. The concept that a relationship requires work is often overlooked because we want them to be fun since everything else in life takes so much energy out of us. Scenario: it’s Monday and you really don’t want to be at work, but you’ve decided to look forward to your life after work so the day isn’t completely miserable. You decide that you want to go to your favorite restaurant. It's a perfect plan; you don’t have to cook anything, there are no dishes afterwards, and you want your significant other there so it’ll be great. Lunch time rolls around and you text your significant other to let him/her know your plan, but a reply doesn’t come around until the end of the day. The delay puts you in a bad mood, leaving you raging at the reply: “I’m hanging out with some friends tonight. Sorry I can’t make it.” What the heck?! I just worked all day, and I just wanted to do something so this day would get better, but it’s not. It’s gotten worse and this just sucks!
Situations like this happen all the time in relationships. Sometimes your world revolves around the person across the table, and other times they seem to be the very object of your destruction. You’ll hear the phrases, “Work through it” or “Just keep fighting because it will get better”. These statements provide great advice because that’s exactly what a relationship requires. You need to work through the tough spots and see the end goal, whatever that may be for you. For some relationships though, the voice of maturity has to yell out above the fighting, tears, and hurt to say, “It isn’t fun anymore. Not any of it.” Some relationships just have to end because it’s not fun and it won’t ever be fun.
Break-ups suck. You’re always on the verge of a breakdown. You want to text them or call them, but you know it’s just going to create more unnecessary hurt. Your world seems different because a part that was once there is now gone. 1 Peter 5:6-7 says, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him because he cares for you.” It is often said that God has a plan for us and that everything happens for a reason so that even when the hard times come, it’s just part of God’s plan. God’s plan is this: He desires to love and care for us. That’s it. Nothing more and nothing less. Any senseless pain or hurt is outside of the Creator’s plan. In times where love cannot be found, we can turn to the cross of Jesus – love in its purest form. The second verse of the hymn “In the Cross of Christ I Glory” goes like this: “When the woes of life o’er take me, Hopes deceive, and fears annoy, Never shall the cross forsake me; Lo, it glows with peace and joy.” In a loveless world, Jesus’ love pours forth from the cross.
Drenched in the love of Jesus,
JS