You're not alone.

You're not weak.

Just don't lose focus. Don't let the last bit of faith in you shatter.

You've made mistakes. Living with that painful realization hurts. You're dragging yourself through the days, I can understand. You feel tired all the time, you feel isolated, your goal seems to have vanished, the food you once loved doesn't fascinate you anymore, your parents are trying their best to keep the hope instilled but they're failing, you are ashamed to face yourself in the mirror, you're afraid to talk because you don't trust anyone, and nothing that is happening around you gives you a positive hope for a better tomorrow.

I understand all of this.

Trust me, I know.

I can see you right where you are. The swollen eyes that carry heavy bags underneath them - bags full of weight from overthinking, worries, regrets, and pains. Your face has forgotten what it feels like when you smile. You can't seem to remember the last time you painted your lips and how much you loved doing so. Your desires, your confidence, your self-love, everything seems to have waned away. But let me tell you this - it's just a phase. A phase of realization. A night that seems to be darker than usual and never-ending, but try to have faith in me because I know there will come the dawn, the shiny rays of the sun to bathe you in newer hopes.

This lack of willingness in you to exist is a demon created by your mind that aims at destroying us. It's thriving on your pain. He is slithering all over your mind asking you to hate everything and give up fighting. Don't let that happen. You can't let a moment of grief destroy everything. Yes, you were cheated by the people you trusted, the people you loved. Yes, you were made a point of ridicule when you started having opinions and questioning things. Yes, you were pressured to let your beliefs melt away so that they could mold you according to them until you realized it wasn't worth it. Yes. All of that happened. I wish it were a nightmare, but it wasn't.

I'm not saying you're not allowed to grieve. Of course, you are. Knowing the mistakes you've done will open the opportunity for you to understand what not to neglect in the future, but does it mean shutting the door to your future and surrendering to the pain? No. Don't let the demon destroy the connection which you're about to establish between you and me. Take the lessons from your mistake and move forward. I know you can. Think about all the happy memories. About all the times when you've discovered how stronger you are. All the times when you've worked hard to achieve something and you have. All the times you've failed and bounced back. Yes, it's similar. This is just another fight. Maybe a tougher than the ones you have faced in the past, but you're about to learn the lesson of life.

You're capable of much more goodness than you give yourself credit for.

I know you don't believe in miracles, however, for once, try submitting yourself to prayers. To a positive mindset. To the hope of better tomorrow. Do it despite how difficult it is for you to focus at the moment. For hope is the essence, the heartbeat of every successful being. What's left in this world without hope? Go out for a walk in the park. You've started despising the light, the chattering of kids in the park, the chirping of birds, and the fresh air that'll surround you the moment you step your feet outside. I know all of this yet here I am asking you to make one step ahead. Embrace your worth. Learn the power of gratitude and be thankful for everything good and bad. Keep your hope alive for I know how good it feels when I look back in the past and think of the time you're in. I congratulate myself for how far I've arrived.

Set yourself free of the box of shame. Stop hiding, and hoping the death to carry you away. The mistakes you did don't shape who you are. It doesn't make you unlovable and unworthy. Most of the people I now talk to have made the same mistakes at the stage of life you're in. Does it mean to stop living? No. Does it mean you grow? Yes.

Before I end this letter, there's one last thing I need to tell you. It's actually two. Read and write. Read more as it'll open your mind. I know you don't like reading self-healing and spiritual stuff but try it. I've learned to do so and I've found myself in a better place - mentally and spiritually. And write. Whatever you want to. Maybe pen down the thoughts that you're having right now and everything that's happening with you. I failed to do so and I often regret it. Not because it would've served as a memoir for me to go through whenever I wanted to take a trip down the lane. But it would've helped me spread the message amongst the ones who're going through the same phase. I understand it's different for everyone, but maybe, just maybe there's a thin chance they can take a positive life lesson out of it and move on much easier than I did? Yeah, there's a possibility and that's the reason I'm asking you to initiate the habit of penning down your thoughts all the time.

That's all I have to say to you.

Remember. I'm here. Happy and thriving. And I'm waiting for you to fight that demon and move ahead so at this point of time, we can connect. You're not alone. I'm with you. Always for as long as you need me.

Connect with me:

Twitter: @bellethewinebae

Instagram: @bellethewinebae

Medium: @bellethewinebae

I also write romantic stories, find them on Wattpad.

Wattpad: www.wattpad.com/bellethewinebae