Recommended for you

Start writing a post

Education

18 John Mulaney Quotes To Use With Your Best Friends Every Day To 'Throw Them Off Their Rythym'

"STREET SMARTS"

Shelby Davis

Feb 20, 2019

University of Virginia

4336

18 John Mulaney Quotes To Use With Your Best Friends Every Day To 'Throw Them Off Their Rythym'

John Mulaney Instagram

John Mulaney is definitely one of the funniest stand-up comedians for college students across the nation. He is very relatable and incredibly funny for everyone. I know my friends and quote him every single day if something sounds the slightest bit familiar to something he has said during his stand up shows.

1. "Huh, what?

2. "You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair."

3. "You seeing this shit? You seeing this Home Alone 2: Lost in New York shit?"

4. "I'll keep all of my emotions right here...then one day I'll die."

5. "Because Bill Clinton never forgets a bitch."

6. "College is just your opinion."

7. "One black coffee, same mother fucker."

8. "What is college? Stop going until we figure it out!"

9. "If I get some fries for the table will you have some? Will you have some fries...OH I KNOW YOU'LL HAVE SOME!"

10. "Fun mom energy."

11. "So you could say I already gave them $120,000!"

12. "I will pepper in the fact that I am gay for backstory."

13. "You want me to do what?"

14. "In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin."

15. "I'm new in town."

16. "Hey, can I walk you home?"

17. "Because we're Delta Airlines and life is a f***ing nightmare."

18. "You know like when you eat too much chocolate cake?"

These may seem very hard to work into conversation, but I promise it is much easier than you think! These will definitely make for some great memories and laughs with your friends.

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Lifestyle

Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

North Carolina State University

1297

Summer is hot and humid, and it's almost like summer was made specifically to drink the refreshing, cold, crisp wonderful, delicious, nutritious nectar of the gods. Which is none other than beer; wonderful cold beer. With summer playing peek-a-boo around the corner while we finish up this semester, it's time to discuss the only important part of summer. And if you haven't already guessed, it's beer. There are few things I take more seriously than my beer, in order are: sports... and beer. Here are my favorite summer brews:

Keep Reading...Show less

beer

Recommended for you

18 John Mulaney Quotes To Use With Your Best Friends Every Day To 'Throw Them Off Their Rythym'

"STREET SMARTS"

1. "Huh, what?

2. "You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair."

3. "You seeing this shit? You seeing this Home Alone 2: Lost in New York shit?"

4. "I'll keep all of my emotions right here...then one day I'll die."

5. "Because Bill Clinton never forgets a bitch."

6. "College is just your opinion."

7. "One black coffee, same mother fucker."

8. "What is college? Stop going until we figure it out!"

9. "If I get some fries for the table will you have some? Will you have some fries...OH I KNOW YOU'LL HAVE SOME!"

10. "Fun mom energy."

11. "So you could say I already gave them $120,000!"

12. "I will pepper in the fact that I am gay for backstory."

13. "You want me to do what?"

14. "In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin."

15. "I'm new in town."

16. "Hey, can I walk you home?"

17. "Because we're Delta Airlines and life is a f***ing nightmare."

18. "You know like when you eat too much chocolate cake?"

Subscribe to our Newsletter

Appreciation for some of life's most discredited pleasures.

1. Sun showers

2. Smiles

3. Tight hugs

4. Discovering new foods you like.

5. Laying in bed after a long day.

6. And being completely relaxed

7. "This reminded me of you"

8. Breakfast foods

9. Over-sized clothes

10. Contagious laughs

11. Car rides with that one person

12. Random (I miss you/ I love you) texts

13. The city at night

14. Surprises

15. Blanket cocoons

16. Good hair days

17. Really good coffee

18. Days where you're in a good mood naturally and for no particular reason

19. Conquering a fear

20. When they give you a lot of guac at Chipotle

21. Being so comfortable with someone that you can literally talk about anything

22. Home-cooked meals

23. Tattoo stories

24. Leaves changing color in fall

25. Butterflies in your stomach

26. Peanut butter & jelly sandwiches

27. When you can't stop laughing

Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

Coors Light Summer Brew:

Leinenkugel Summer Shandy

Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat

Want to know more about beer?

Sam Adams Summer Ale

Hell or High Watermelon

Blue Moon Summer Honey

LandShark Lager

Corona

75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

Perfect Weather

You'll get an effortless tan

You can exercise with a view

You don't have to worry about bug bites

In n Out all day, every day

We have outdoor concerts

We live where people vacation

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

1. “Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

2. “Tonight, we are young.”

3. “Cuz I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it.”

4. “Tell me how they got that pretty little face on that pretty little frame.”

5. “I can’t wait to fall in love with you, you can’t wait to fall in love with me.”

6. “Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on.”

7. “Why you so obsessed with me?”

8. “We ain’t ever getting older.”

9. “I didn’t know that I was starving until I tasted you.”

10. “Didn’t they tell you I’m a savage?"

11. “I’m gonna make you miss me.”

Subscribe to our
Newsletter

1. "Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
You wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
For a moment that just don't come
Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)