Lately, #METOO has been trending on social media, and for all the right reasons. Finally, women and girls are no longer afraid to shy away from the harassment they experienced and feel confident confronting their aggressors (from a distance hopefully) and taking a stand. These brave women are the reason I am finally saying “Me Too!”
As a woman, I am often subjected to harsh criticism and demeaning comments, but that is nothing compared to the harassment I experienced during my Junior year of high school from my principal. This man, an educator who is supposed to encourage and foster education among students in a healthy environment, belittled me to the point where I was physically terrified to attend school.
I grew up in a town where sensible rules dictate that a male teacher is not permitted to be in a room alone with an unaccompanied female student unless the door was open. However, this man decided to ignore the rules, not only closing the door but keeping me locked in there with him for 70 minutes without anyone present. It was at that time he decided to share his insulting opinions about learning disabilities, make derogatory and anti-Semitic comments about my religion and questioned my integrity. These actions later made me question my self-worth.
At 18 months old, I was diagnosed with a learning disability, rendering me different from a “traditional student”, evident by a 70-point spread in my IQ. School rules required that I be reevaluated every three years involving academic and psychological testing. My learning disability is and always will be ever present, but with assistance from caring and patient teachers, I developed studying and test-taking skills that served me well throughout school placing me at the top 5-10% of my class. Yet the one person every student should rely on to advocate and support them decided to say, “learning disabilities don’t exist, I must have made it up from a fear of failing.”
Over the course of those 70 minutes, he attempted to intimidate me, denying the validity of my learning disability as evidenced by my high GPA. He pulled out my transcript, circled every grade and insisted that the document doesn’t reflect a learning disability. The final straw was when he insulted my parents and our religion. He claimed their “neuroticism” was the real disability and proceeded to make anti-Semitic remarks about all the “Jews” he has dealt with over the years. I was beyond offended; my parents were and still are my greatest advocates.
I finally reacted, “Have you even looked at my 504? Have you seen the 70-point spread in my IQ? How do you deny what has been evident since I was two years old? How is that false labeling? Have you even looked at my file? My straight A’s are the result of over-compensating through an insane amount of time I spend studying and preparing. Ask any teacher about my work habits; they will tell you I put in 150% effort into everything I do.”
I left that meeting feeling broken and questioning what I thought were the best three years of my life and my self-worth. I had never felt so defeated or powerless in my entire life. I spent the next few weeks sneaking in late, dodging him in the always and running in the opposite direction in hopes to avoid him.
At the end of the year, I made the difficult decision to leave the high school that originally offered me so much. I left my friends, my student government positions, my theater troupe, and the chance to graduate valedictorian. I left because the one man who controlled the school stood in the way of me feeling safe and achieving my goals. However, after I left, I realized I was so much more than this man made me believe. My senior year was unconventional, but I landed two internships, performed in an equity play and participated in over 300 hours of community service, speaking to elementary students about bullying and learning disabilities.
The lesson I learned from this situation, “Leave the table when love is no longer being served.” Despite my high school offering some great experiences, the moment I was being hurt from the situation I knew it was time to go. I refused to remain the victim of a hopeless situation. Whether you are facing the same situation with a friendship, relationship, or job, do not let anyone else determine how you feel about yourself. No teacher, boyfriend, boss, family member, ANYONE should make you feel small, inferior, or in my case worthless. It is time to stand up and say, “Time’s Up!”