To my future self:

When you were younger, you read a novel. This novel discussed memories of the Vietnam War and experiences that people had during it, things that people carried with them. And not just things like weapons or letters, things like responsibility and commitment. People carry symbolic and meaningful things with them that don’t necessarily have to be objects or materials. They carry things from the heart.

"The Things They Carried" revolves around the Vietnam War, but it teaches us about so much more than that.

“I’ve never tried to block out the memories of the past, even though some are painful. I don’t understand people who hide from their past. Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now.”

Memories. Everyone has memories of things that have happened during their lives, good or bad. Either way, the memories that these events create tend to have an impact on people, and cause them to remember the event. Maybe it made a small impact on the person and didn’t mean much to them. Maybe it made a huge impact on them and forced them to never forget the occurrence. Big or small, the event was meaningful and caused the person to remember some or all of it. Memories shape the people that we are today. I know it sounds a little strange and maybe others disagree with this, but it’s honestly the truth. If we didn’t create memories or have any moments that we could remember, what would life be like? We wouldn’t have stories to tell, lessons that we could learn from, or things to reflect on. We have to have these memories and happenings during our lives, because they truly make us the people we are today.

There are so many different types of memories. Some might be humorous, or depressing, or extravagant. Some people could have an array of memories that range from one to the other. Other people might have one or two memories that they have. It doesn’t matter if you have one, or two, or one hundred memories. Sometimes memories are accidental or caused by you or another person, and you are able to learn and reflect from them. Then there are the other times when memories come from events that are out of your power and control, and there is nothing you can do to fix them, but instead are only able to accept. There is always something that you can take from a memory, positive or negative.

I have a memory.

I have a lot of memories that have impacted my life in one way or another, but I have one particular one that changed me forever and is something that I will always carry with me. It is about a teenage girl and her mother, and the bond they shared. The mother and the daughter were not perfect; no relationship is. They fought over silly little things and got into arguments from time to time, but none of that stuff really ever mattered in the end. The mother and daughter were able to talk with one another about almost anything. School, sports, friends, boys, you name it. They were able to communicate with one another about anything. Not every mother and daughter have that type of relationship, and those that do should consider themselves lucky. Having someone to talk to is important, especially when you are a teenager and are growing up. The mother would also give the daughter advice on things that were going on in the daughters life. If the daughter had a problem and would express it to her mother, the mother would give her advice. She would help the daughter through. After talking to her mother, the daughter would know what to do; if she didn’t know what to do, she would at least feel like she had some options to help to make a final decision on what to do.

All of these things made their relationship special and something to cherish forever. That’s why it was so difficult when the mother passed away that one teenage year of the girl’s life. The reason for her death was from a disease, and it could no longer be prevented. The girl was devastated for awhile. She felt hopeless. Confused. Sad. Angry. Depressed. Why was this happening? What was going on? Her “rock” was just taken from her. For some time, the girl tried carry on while holding onto the grief and sad memory of her mother’s departure, but eventually learned to carry the positive’s with her. She remembered all of the advice, good times, conversations, and moments that she spent with her mother. She remembered all of the life lessons and valuable things her mother taught her. These were the things she would carry with her, rather than the sad thoughts that came with the thought of her mother. From that day on, the girl always carried the positive memories of her mother, and would never let them go.

Years later, the girl thought about why she carried this memory with her and how it affected her. Why? Well, it helped make her into her current self. The girl I took everything that her mother taught her and I applied it to her life. The girl asked herself what her mother would do in certain situations, and also took the advice she gave her to help guide her.

She is a memory.

The lessons, the teachings, it is all memory. Memories that made an impact. Memories that will never be forgotten. They make up the girl who is writing this letter.

The point of me writing this letter to you, future self, is not to lecture you, or to inform you. It’s just a little reminder of something you carry. We might not think about our memories all of the time, but they will always be with us and will be something that we never forget. You will go on and create new memories along with ones you have already created, but always keep the special, significant ones close to your heart forever. This one memory of mother, along with other memories, will always be with you. Never forget them, because they are the reason that you are you.

With much love,

You