“Good grief” is an oxymoron. An oxymoron is the term for two words that do not belong together. Looking at “good grief,” it’s obvious that these two words do not belong together…or do they?
Grief is most often associated with the process of emotions one goes through after the death of a loved one. I am going through a rather enjoyable grief with the death of my great-grandma. What a sociopath! I’ll explain: My great-grandmother, or Dadsmom, had Alzheimer’s. She suffered from the disease for at least the last 8 years of her life. The disease had stripped her of her humanity, leaving only the husk of the wonderful woman she was.
In case you have never had a loved one with Alzheimer’s, it goes something like this: My great-grandfather died a peaceful death in 2010. In 2010, my great-grandmother had just enough short term memory to remember, at most, the last 15 minutes. So what does this mean for a two-hour long viewing? Dadsmom faced the fact that the man she loved was dead roughly 8 times. He died next to her while they were asleep in the nursing home…but she didn’t remember that.
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Suffering to say the least! Due to the lack of treatment for Alzheimer’s, I knew she didn’t stand a chance, so my prayer was always that God would end her suffering. The fact that God let his servant suffer for so long was a stumbling stone for my faith…until the funeral this past Wednesday.
The sheer giddiness I had going to this funeral bordered on the brink of clinical insanity. It made sense to me, but not everybody else. A conversation in passing would go, “I have to leave Wednesday for my great-grandmother’s funeral.” Person’s appropriate reply, “I’m sorry for your loss.” My crazy response, “Well this is a good funeral!” And I’d go away smiling while the other would go away slightly disturbed.
The 4-hour solo drive from my college to my hometown only progressed my altered mental state, but was enjoyable nonetheless and non-damaging for my actual mental well-being. Before the funeral, a short viewing was held for family and friends. Upon seeing the body of my great-grandmother laying in the casket, my eyes welled up with tears. She looked like Dadsmom. No intense sedatives, no disease, no forgetfully furrowed brows. The disease was gone and so was she.
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The body that lay in the casket was not the woman I knew and loved because she was united with her Savior the instant her life on this earth ceased. The church where the funeral service was held had a crucifix (a cross with the body of Christ on it) above the alter. The outcome of sin lay in the casket. Death. Then, above the casket, hangs Christ’s body on the cross. My eyes get a little watery at the beautiful unspoken message before me.
Dadsmom knew she was sinful and needed a Savior so that, when she did die, she would live. Romans 6:1-11 reads, “What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.
In these words, we know that we can always grieve with joy for those who have faith in Christ Jesus. No matter if the death be tragic, unwanted, or, in Dadsmom’s case, much needed, we know that our loved ones are now celebrating with the Lamb in His Kingdom. In this joy, we may certainly have good grief.
Grieving Joyfully,
JS