My story is very different than most 20-year-olds. I come from a small family, I go to church, I love Jesus, I have a boyfriend who is my best friend, and I love to travel. But those are just things that are normal about me, I am a tad bit quirky as well.

I have a story that I write a new chapter of daily. Every footstep is another word on the page, and every new task is another section. My story is compiled when I am sleeping, and will hopefully spread awareness long after I am gone.

Me telling my story is not for you to feel bad for me, but it is for the opposite. I want you to celebrate my little victories with me. Going to class daily is a big deal for me, making dinner is a victory. In 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 the Message version it says:

"All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us. We have plenty of hard times that come from following the Messiah, but no more so than the good times of his healing comfort—we get a full measure of that, too."

I want to help people going through the situation I am navigating to make sure that they always know that someone is on their side. My difficult journey will hopefully help people learn how to find joy in the little things, persevere through rough circumstances, and learn to not take the little things for granted.

My story starts with a long battle with pain. When I was 16 I had some stress fractures, but long after the stress fractures were healed, the pain continued. I then just had some blood work just to rule out a chronic pain disorder, but the results rocked my world.

I was later diagnosed with Juvenile Idiopathic Rheumatoid Arthritis, and recently my diagnosis was updated to Rheumatoid and Psoriatic Arthritis. Both of these are not your typical osteoarthritis, they are autoimmune diseases. They turn my body against itself causing my immune system to damage to my skin, joints, ligaments, muscles, and bones.

What this causes for me is inflammation, chronic pain, fatigue, nausea, joint damage, and for my skin to be red, itchy, flakey, and all types of nasty. The treatment for RA and PsA often leave me with a very weak immune system, tired, and just not feeling well overall.

There is also a mental part to RA and PsA as well. From feeling sick all the time to having trouble falling asleep, you often feel not yourself. As of recently I have to be extremely careful of not pushing myself, having to be isolated to protect my body from getting really sick really quick, fatigue (which is why sometimes I cancel plans or forget to respond to people right away), and also makes me feel like I have failed at the most basic bodily functions. Some days I feel so sad that I can not move out of bed, cannot really walk or run much. It also makes me feel anxious that people will think that I am unreliable because I have to cancel plans because I cannot even make my body move at all. The last thing I ever want people to think of me is that I am lazy, uninterested, or self-centered because that is not me. Sometimes the sadness I feel for these reasons can be overwhelming, and to be honest, it makes it harder to fight. Along with chronic pain can sometimes follow chronic senses of uselessness, guiltiness, and anxiety.

But one thing that changes things is Jesus. Throughout the path I am walking on, it has always been light, even when it should be dim. Faith and hope get me through the rough nights and bring me to the glorious mornings. I have 5 tips for people struggling with a chronic illness that has greatly helped me through my journey.

1. Be nice

Being nice really can help you even on days where it is hard to remain calm, cool, and collected. When I go into the doctors' offices I always make it a point to be extra nice. I get it when you don't feel good, and you are getting shoved full of needles it is uncomfortable and sometimes you get crabby. What I have realized is that it takes more energy to be mad, and it puts everyone else in a bad mood. Recently I was at the doctor's for over 3 hours, and after waiting for blood work for 2.5 of those hours and they could not get the needle in a vein for the life of them. Instead of asking what they were doing wrong, I asked if there was anything I was doing wrong so I could help them. Now, those ladies at the lab always greet me with a smile and know my name.

2. Be open to people that need to know

Being honest with certain people and telling them what is going on is something that is really important to me. Every single time I go to the doctor there are 3 people that I update when I get out, I ask for prayer, positive thoughts, and encouragement from them. I am not saying it is easy, but sometimes asking people for help really does help. I am not saying scream out all your medical information to everyone who will listen, I mean pick a couple of people that you trust to confide in. I also believe that it helps you realize you are not alone.

3. Keep your eye on the prize

One thing that has helped me continue to move on and get better is goalkeeping. When I wake up, before I get out of bed I set goals for myself for the day. Whether it is something small like taking a shower or something even bigger like going out shopping whatever it is I build my ladder. I saw this on a Youtube(r) who has a background with chronic pain and it changed the way I look at my life. Everything I do is another step I add to my ladder. Even walking to the bathroom, or brushing my hair can be seen as another step. No matter what you do it is another step on the ladder. I also find that my faith helps me through the issues as well. I can motivate myself with scripture, pray, and even fast and feel like I have accomplished something.

4. Celebrate victories

One thing that is a continuation of keeping your eye on the prize is to celebrate your victories, or otherwise known as the steps you build on your ladder. For me, I celebrate my victories with extra luxuries such as face masks, watching a sermon online, or snuggling up with a good book. Celebrating victories can also be known to many others as self-care. Self-care is so important. Our bodies are gifts, and it is our responsibility to take care of them. You can always get an extension on a paper, but you cannot get another chance to live after you die. Taking care of yourself is not exactly selfish, it is an act to make sure that you can continue to serve others effectively in the future. No one benefits from you when you are so sick that you are throwing up because of being in pain. Do not let others get in the way of you taking care of yourself, you know your body more than you think. I also think you should take care of yourself by really focusing on where your self-worth comes from. When you are lacking self-care, in some situations it can lead to a lack of self-worth. You are worth it.

5. Live every day to your fullest

The most important thing I have learned through this season is to live every day to the fullest. You never know that the next day will bring, but at the same time find comfort in the fact that God has the future planned perfectly for you. One thing that I have made a policy in my relationship is that we do not end a date, or even a day angry at each other. It helps you talk out the issues, reflect on your actions, and improve on communication. Every day is a gift, a precious gift. Do not take advantage of even the littlest thing that God has given us, which is time. In one second your life can change, and in one second you can decide to change someone's life. 60 little seconds equal one small minute. 60 minutes is an hour. 24 hours is one day.