Okay people, here it is! What you’ve all been waiting for! The guide to the college dating scene at Universities. After talking to both girls and guys, I’ve found a perfectly paved road ladies and gents! If you want to date in college, or anywhere really, here are the rules and lines to stay inside.
1. Guys should always make the first move.
Okay, ladies! Remember all those empowering Instagram and social media posts about how you should go for what you want? All those times you were told you can’t get anything unless you go for it? All that stuff about how guys and girls are equal in all ways and should be able to do the same things? Yeah, apparently that doesn’t apply to dating.
Guys? Make sure you make the first move. Don’t worry about possibly getting rejected or being nervous as hell! You just got to push through and do it. This is your responsibility, apparently. Oh, I know, I know. Not fair, but hey! According to University students, the guy should make the first move. When asked why, the answers I received from a majority of guys were: “That’s just how it is” or “That’s what my parents taught me.” From a majority of girls I got: “The guy just should” to “A guy should take charge.” So, forget about girls going for what they want, equal responsibility, or any of that mess. Forget that guys making the first move is a traditional idea from the stone-age. People, if you want to date follow this rule.
2. Guys should be the decision-makers (Take charge!)
Girls, if you want you can make some decisions, like where you want to eat or the movie, etc. However, the majority of girls on prefer that the guys are on the ones who take charge. So girls, you can just sit back and relax I guess and let the guys choose everything, because that totally helps with keeping the meek and submissive girl stereotype that women have spent ages trying to get rid of. You go girls! Let’s just continue to live in a patriarchal society.
Boys, looks like you’re left with all the responsibility again! I know, pressure. What if she doesn’t like what you pick? What if you don’t know what you want either? Well, I’m sorry, looks like you’re not getting any help here. Apparently, you have to take charge all the time. Who cares if you make the wrong decision and you’re blamed? Not society, that’s for sure! I’m sorry to tell you boys, if you don’t take charge you’re viewed as indecisive, a feminine quality and you must be masculine all the time!
3. Grooming and clothing
Guys, before you go out on a date or are looking for one, you just need to do a few things. You need to shower (with soap and water, if you need me to be specific, you’d probably want to throw some shampoo in there, but it’s not a necessity…some girls like that grungy look, I guess.). You should brush your teeth and put on some clean clothes, and if you want throw on some cologne. It’s probably nothing that's not on your daily routine, if you look really good? Those are just extra points for you, no one is judging you too harshly on all this. If you’re funny and smart, you can usually get by. Typically, people care what you guys have to say.
Girls! You ready for this? You need to shower, wash your hair, condition, shave, do your makeup (God forbid, you leave the house without your makeup done), pick an outfit, accessorize that outfit, put on some perfume and wear a pair of shoes that ties everything perfectly together. LADIES! This is very important, all of it. Have you not seen the TV Shows? The ads on billboards and commercials? Every girl on every magazine? Guys have expectations! Society has expectations! Look good, wait…no, look great… no, no, no, look perfect. Isn’t that what you guys have learned since day one? I mean, it’s not as if your personality means anything.
4. Jealousy
Guys, you get jealous? Oh that’s just male instinct. You’re staking your claim! And girls, for some reason, find it very attractive.
Girls? You get jealous, you’re going to get the “crazy bitch” label, so you better burry that jealousy deep, deep down, even if you’re justified! It’s not attractive.
5. The man pays
Girls, leave your wallets at home! Tradition says you don’t have to worry about this. The 21st century and the Victorian era is very similar, I suppose.
Boys, you better have a job and your wallet handy. You are supposed to treat for everything, well at least at the beginning! If you don’t? You are considered rude and a question of your masculinity comes into play! Nevermind, that the economy sucks and you might not have the best job. What you can bring to the table moneywise? That is vital!
6. A guy can be a player but a girl cannot be a slut.
Gents! Well, you guys go and have fun. Sleep with as many people and screw over as many people as you want, I guess! Apparently there’s nothing wrong with you guys sleeping around and having a grand old time. Your body count? That doesn’t matter at all and it most certainly does not go against you when you try to date someone. Get this? People actually just say you have “experience” and it gives you a leg up on other guys. So, you go guys. But, on a side note, and this is just my personal advice…make sure you regularly get tested for STDS, or don’t. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.
Well, ladies! You should all probably get a chastity belt or something. Next to a virgin, a guy finds nothing more attractive than a girl who hasn’t been with a lot of people. So keep your body count low, because if you get called the s-word (slut), say goodbye to any guy taking you seriously and guys talk worse than girls, so it’ll get around quick. When you girls sleep with a lot of people, sorry to say, people don’t see it as you gaining “experience” they see it as you being easy, opening your legs for anyone, or you being “dirty” and a guy doesn’t want to date you. Apparently, you girls can’t go out, have fun and enjoy sex as much as guys on a regular basis (unless you have a boyfriend, of course). Completely unreasonable and a huge double standard, I know. But I’m just telling you what the people have told me!
7. Cuddling
Girls, no matter what. You’re in the right with this topic. You don’t want to? He must’ve been a dick, no way could it be you are simply moody! If you want to? That’s just you being a girl…wow that comes to your advantage here.
Guys, if you don’t you’re a dick. An unemotional, uncaring, cold, asshole. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had a long day or you need some space, nope! No excuses for you.
8. The walk home the next morning.
Gentleman! Congratulations! You walking home in the morning in broad daylight with the clothes on from the night before? Pats on the back and admiring looks from others. You just scored.
Ladies… yeah. Get ready for those judging stares. Steal a hoodie from him and cover your face for that walk of shame
9. You’re going to have to go about your friendships differently.
This is for both you ladies and gentlemen. Apparently, when you start dating someone having a friend of the opposite sex becomes a complicated matter. You can no longer give them big hugs, go hang out one on one at the movies or a lunch or Starbucks run, or text too much (that’s just unacceptable, I guess). Once you start dating someone, everything you do with the opposite sex become scrutinized. I mean, obviously you become a whole new person and all the actions you did before you started dating to your friends of the opposite sex means something completely different now!
So there you have it everyone! The double standard, traditional and completely acceptable rules of dating for college students. I mean, haven’t you all done it or thought the same things?