Suffering with anxiety can lead to an extremely difficult and stressful life. It is even more stressful when your friends can't relate to your disorder since people now a days misuse this term to explain that they just might be a little more nervous than usual. In reality, anxiety is an actual mental disorderthat people struggle with everyday of their lives. Finding out that other people can relate to your unrealistic worries and the panicky state you're always in is a blessing. You don't have to feel like you're the only one going crazy anymore.
Below are just a few of the struggles people who suffer from anxiety deal with that some people just don't understand.
1. Someone Changes Plans On You Last Minute
Really?! We need to know four days in advance about changed plans, not ten minutes before when we're all ready to leave. We get it, things change, but now we need another hour to envision all the things that will go wrong now and prepare for the worst with the new plans.
2. Having To Go To a New Place
"What is it going to be like? What does it look like? Wait, I don't want to go. Does it have a bathroom? What does that look like? Oh god, I don't want to do this."
3. "You Really Need To Calm Down and Stop Worrying."
As if saying this is going to cure it. You told us to calm down so all our worries and excessive panic attacks just disappeared. No. When people say this, if anything, it makes us worry more. Are we bothering you with our worrying that we probably don't even realize we're doing?
4. Eating In Front Of People You Don't Know
This is probably the craziest thing that happens when you have anxiety. We don't want to have the embarrassment of eating like a caveman (even though we're the only ones thinking that) or the slightest chance we get a piece of food stuck in your teeth or on our mouth, so we tend eat the smallest, tiniest bites possible to avoid it all. In case this does happen, the embarrassment will haunt us for the next four weeks.
5. Having to Present and Talk In Class
No explanation needed.
6. "Its okay, I'm not mad anymore."
"Well are you? Or aren't you? You definitely are still mad. Okay maybe you're not, but why would you say this to me? Can you just please tell me if you are or aren't. Are we going to be fighting forever? Please tell me?" These are the thoughts we have when someone says this. We can't drop the thought that someone is saying this. In any case that this happens, we're still always going to feel at fault.
7. Having To Ask Someone To Repeat Everything
We don't do this on purpose. We just need to be told things four or five times so we completely understand what we're doing so we don't mess up. That is our biggest worry. An even bigger worry is that you will get annoyed that we have to ask for you to repeat. Makes total sense.
8. Being Late to Something
Knowing we're going to be late for something whether it is class or a meeting, even if it is only 3 minutes late, freaks us out. The thought of walking in late, all eyes on you, all the attention on you, is not even worth coming in for. We can probably admit that we've skipped a class or two because we knew we were going to be late. Sorry professor...
9. "Stop Acting Like The World Is Ending, There Are People That Are Dying."
Yes. We know this. We know freaking out over a little thing is silly. We are aware. We know people have bigger problems. But when we are in the middle of a panic attack, we aren't going to register this in our mind. Our one focus is our panic attack and that's it. It doesn't make us feel any better. It just makes us panic more that we are getting belittled for our disorder.
10. Not Knowing How to Socialize At a Party/Event
"Why am I here? I'm not enjoying this. I hate this." Socializing is one of our biggest fears. Not having the confidence or ability to talk to someone new will bring us to tears, I promise you.
11. Losing the Only Person You Know At a Party/Event
"Find a happy place, find a happy place." We'll just sit in the corner and sob.
12. "Just Take A Xanax."
Taking a Xanax might relax us, but just saying it as if it will make our disorder disappear is a struggle. We don't feel any more relaxed from you saying that.
13. Having To Talk On The Phone Or Make An Appointment
The simple task of picking up the phone and talking to someone makes us literally gag. We'd rather do anything but talk on the phone. Imagining the embarrassing pauses or that someone you don't know will pick up is unbearable.
14. Being In A Relationship
We're going to overthink, overanalyze, and overwhelm ourselves with making sure we are doing our best in treating our partner right. We may be hard to understand but we try our hardest, especially in relationships. Dating us is sorta hard work, but all we ask is for patience and love.