After spending our spring break embarking on adventures 3,000 miles wide, my husband and I have returned more in love than when we left. I mean, that's the goal of a honeymoon, right? To bring you closer?
Well, it worked. Most couples take a few days right after their wedding and go on an awesome trip complete with alone time, great food and plenty of rest. The same was true for our spectacular trip, but our honeymoon ended up being five months later than our wedding. Being married in college will make school break schedules a priority when planning the trip of a lifetime.
After spending the last week alone with my husband, I have been re-exposed to many things that make him the gentleman he is. If you are wondering about how to be a gentleman in this awful modern age, wonder no more! Here are 10 things you can do (fellas) or expect (ladies) for a blissful relationship.
1. Pick up the tab.
I realize that we are married, so picking up the tab isn't as big of a deal as it is when you're dating. However, on our trip, we felt like we were back in the first puppy love-crazed months of our relationship. Jake would always take care of the bill before I even had time to look at it. Very classy, and keeps one more worry off the lady's mind.
2. Walk on the side of the road where traffic is close.
I feel like this is common sense, because, hello, cute outfits on a pretty woman should not be ruined by water from a puddle that a car splashes on you. However, after experiencing life in places like D.C. and NYC this past week, having Jake walk closer to the traffic was super helpful. It kept my anxiety at bay, and I got to hold on to his arm. Squeezing his muscles is a plus for you, while him "protecting" you in that sense is encouraging for him. Win/win.
3. Pull out her chair — or let her pick her seat first.
Looking cute and trying to gracefully sit down without flopping all over the place like a whale can be a bit of a challenge. Guys, pull out her seat for her, or let her pick her seat first (if you're in a booth). This allows her to feel comfortable, in control of her surroundings, and still look hella cute while settling in (even if you're in a dive joint on the coast of Maine where everyone is bundled up and going for that "windblown look").
4. Plan a romantic evening — not Netflix and chill.
Need I say more? Fellas, take her out! It's awful being cooped up all day, whether it is in class or in the office at work. Plan a nice evening and have everything on an agenda. It doesn't have to be expensive either! Let her relax, and she'll thank you for it. One of our favorite things we did on our honeymoon was driving up the coast to a place called Schoodic Point. Ice caps were flying off the waves as they broke against the cliffs. Talk about a beautiful view, secluded area and a once in a lifetime experience that didn't cost a dime!
5. Save her the last piece of dessert. Better yet, bake for her.
What woman doesn't love sweets? Saving the last bite of the sweetest part of dinner for her will totally melt her, and if you bake for her, she'll think you're extra sweet (see what I did there?)! We planned our honeymoon agenda around when we could stop on the road and eat. When we stopped, we were grateful for a break. We were also grateful for a little bit of sugar to perk us up as we continued in our travels. By saving the last bite of dessert for me, Jake always earned himself an extra kiss!
6. Rub her feet after a long day.
It doesn't matter if she's wearing heels, flats, sneakers or flip-flops. Letting your girl relax after being on her feet for a while is sure to earn you brownie points. Wearing cute shoes while doing life all day can be exhausting, and getting the treat of a foot massage is something every woman wants! I know I sure appreciated it after walking through NYC all day.
Warning: This is not an invitation to tickle her foot. Nope, don't even try it. You'll end up with a nice, accidental kick in the face.
7. When you go out to eat, focus on her.
Well, this goes for all the time, really. However, after eating out for every meal this past week, I noticed a lot of couples having one person focus more on the TV than the person sitting in front of them. You can watch TV at home. Enjoy a meal out with your significant other! The only "TV" we watched all week was Netflix in bed at the B&B after adventuring all day. Dinner was one of our favorite parts of the entire trip, and it was perfect to be able to have so much to talk about rather than watching some muted show on a too-small television on the wall.
8. Keep your hands to yourself and off your phone.
While you may be all about the PDA, other people may not enjoy it. And if your only goal of the night is to get your hands on your partner, maybe you should re-evaluate why you embarked on a night out. A kiss goodnight is usually always acceptable, though! Or a Hershey's kiss goodnight — we went to Hershey World in Hershey, Penn., and we got more kisses there than we did the entire trip!
When it come to phones, put them down. Seriously. Are you on a date with your iPhone? No. You're on a date with a person. Treat them with the respect they deserve!
9. Let them rest.
While our trip was everything we hoped for and more, we were exhausted at times. Traveling 3,000 miles in a week will do that to you. Sometimes you need to drive an extra hour so your better half can sleep. Do it. Sometimes they need to vent to get their frustrations of the day out of the way. Listen. Sometimes they just need five more minutes, whether they're napping, sitting in silence or crying. Wait.
Jake was a trooper and drove more than any one man should over the course of the week. He's the real MVP. Love you, boo!
And finally...
10. Admire what makes your person themselves.
We are each fearfully and wonderfully made (Ps. 139:14), and that means we all have our quirks that make us, well, us. Jake appreciates that I have different taste in music (sorry, Seger and Springsteen, I just can't), and that I am a perfectionist by fault. I appreciate how he works way too hard to take care of us (he's a perfectionist in his work ethic), and how he sets 15 alarms on a daily basis. I have my own taste, and he has his. He never fails to make me feel valued, though. Being a gentleman in this day and age is more than just doing stuff for your love, it's about being someone for them as well. Be someone who admires them, who encourages them, who stands by them when no one else will. Be willing to stay up late and listen if they need to talk about their fears. Be willing to help them chase their dreams, no matter how unreachable they may seem. Be willing to fight for them when life is beating them up. They will remember you more fondly for the qualities you embody than for the materialistic things you can give them.