They came into your life when you least expected them to, and now you can’t imagine surviving without them. The term “best friend” no longer describes your messed up, crazy, and perfect friendship. Without even trying to, to two of you have morphed into Meredith Grey and Cristina Yang. She is so much more than your best friend; she is your person.

So how can you tell that you’ve found your person, the friend who is an extension of yourself, your “ride or die?” You probably already know, if your friendship looks something like this.

1. You encourage each other to get up and go to class.

2. But on days when one of you can’t seem to make it out of bed, you’ll both stay in.

3. They know all of your secrets.

4. You get low-key annoyed when you hear someone else refer to them as their “best friend.”

5. You are equally opposed to cliche heart to hearts.

6. Because that’s not the way you two usually handle your emotions.

7. But when one of you needs a therapist, you know that there’s no one else you’d turn to.

8. You understand that sometimes she’s a B when she’s hungry, tired, stressed, etc., and it doesn’t bother you.

9. But when it gets to be too much, you have no problem putting her in her place.

10. She’ll encourage your spontaneous ideas, and usually she joins in on the fun.

11. She’s basically been adopted into your family.

12. Your boyfriend has accepted her as a third member of the relationship, and vice-versa.

13. No one else appreciates spontaneous dance parties as much as the two of you.

14. You know that no matter what, you’ll always be there for each other at the end of the day.