Everyone knows that moment at a party -- you are weary from haphazardly bouncing up and down and gyrating your pelvis to 476 consecutive songs about getting low, and all you want to do is stumble to the nearest couch, slowly shovel mounds of chips and salsa into your mouth, and sleep through the nearest winter. But all of a sudden, the DJ (in this case, Jim, whose phone we used only because he was the only one with Spotify Premium) changes the mood and your favorite song comes on. You indicate that it is your favorite song by saying something like “Wow! This is my favorite song!” and you are filled with a euphoria that can only be compared to what Napoleon would have felt if he had only had the opportunity to wear Air Jordan.

Although you may think it’s your favorite song, you actually have a lot of them. These are the songs that will get you away from any sort of chip-dip combo, and get you embarrassingly flailing your arms in the middle of the dance floor. 

"Mr. Brightside" by the Killers. Whenever this slightly-voyeuristic song, about the uncontainable heartbreak and jealousy felt at the sight of the woman you love having intercourse with another man, comes on, you are filled with so much happiness that you can’t help but jump up and down and describe your love for it. 

"All The Small Things" by Blink 182. This song reminds you of the time of light-up sneakers and jean shorts, of Ring-Pops and Pop Rocks, of GameBoys and Playstation 1, of braces and hairless armpits, and of the school bus and no homework on weekends. Nothing quite like nostalgia. 

"Yeah!" by Usher. Without a doubt, the dumbest song ever written, you turn up so hard to “Yeah!” that you don’t even notice how idiotic it is, when you look around to see a profusion of teenagers bumping into each other yelling, “Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!” over and over again, as if someone had asked a group of try-hards if they got laid in high school.

"Party In The U.S.A" by Miley Cyrus. Remember when we all thought this was scandalous? Of course you do. That’s why you love it so much. Nothing brings back the good times, like when Miley Cyrus used to be Billy Rae Cyrus’ daughter.

"Blurred Lines" by Robin Thicke. Hmm -- doesn’t this song sort of glorify the chauvinistic ideals that are tarnishing the reputation of college social life and shutting down fraternities across the nation?  

"Safe And Sound" by Capital Cities. Nothing makes a party so great as pretending like you have indie cred. This song has horns, for Chrissake! So hipster. You are such a hipster for listening to this song. Good for you, hipster. You have earned the right to keep dancing. 

"Don’t Stop Believin’" by Journey. Did anyone ever find out what happened to the small town girl who went unsupervised on the train in the middle of the night going to no specified destination? Doesn’t matter, because all you care about right now is how truly awesome your best friend is. Go put your arm around him as you both chant the lyrics to this song as if the aliens could hear you. 

"Gangnam Style" by PSY. Just kidding. You can go to the bathroom, now. This will be over in a few minutes. 

"Hey Ya!" by Outkast. You have pretended to know the lyrics to this song since your backpack still had wheels, and nothing makes you so happy as the opportunity to mess them up again in front of a large crowd. Props to you for knowing the polaroid part, though. 

"Can’t Hold Us" by Macklemore. See, white people can like rap, too. This counts as rap, right? He seems to be talking very quickly. That’s what rap is, right. Looks up “rap” on Urban Dictionary.  

"Sexy And I Know It" by LMFAO. When this song was released, we were all in high school, and did not feel like we were sexy; we weren’t very sure about it, either. Nothing is more fun than burying deep-rooted insecurity by wiggling your junk until it goes numb. 

"Pompeii" by Bastille. “Hi! My name is Ryan! Sort of tragic how the citizens of Pompeii were all destroyed by that volcano and probably thought it was an unspeakable divine punishment for the sins they had committed, huh? Want to dance?” 

"I Gotta Feeling" by The Black Eyed Peas. I retract my earlier statement. This is the dumbest song ever written.