There is not a human alive that could deny the appeal of one Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Whether you love him from his absolute dominance of the WWE scene, for his autobiography that was a New York Times Bestseller, or for his incredible charity work, no one can deny his appeal. From starring in (and basically reviving) the “Fast and Furious” franchise to warming your heart in family films like “The Game Plan,” this man does it all effortlessly and you’ll be in love with him for ages without even realizing.

With so many achievements, so much heart, and such a flawless physique, it makes me wonder why more people haven’t discovered that the way to true happiness is through him. Or with him, rather.

Even if we can’t all have our own living, breathing Dwayne Johnson to have and hold for the rest of our days, we definitely can have the next best thing: a cardboard cutout of the legend himself. Don’t believe that this is the next best step for your dating life? Let me try and convince you.

1. He’s super strong but light as a feather.

They don’t call him “The Rock” for nothing, you know. Like, this dude is stacked. So you can enjoy his bulging muscles any time you want with the added bonus of never having to worry about whether or not you’ll be able to drag him anywhere you need to go. Plus, no one would be surprised if Dwayne Johnson could lift you, but it’ll be even cooler when people see that you can lift Dwayne Johnson.

2. He’d be a great listener.

One of the best things about an unblinking cardboard cutout? Unwavering eye contact. Plus, he’s got lovely eyes to fall into as you tell him about your day, your dreams, your favorite movies, and anything else you could possibly think of to say. Plus, it’s not like he’s gonna be able to spill your secrets. Cardboard Dwayne Johnson is here for you.

3. You’ll always know where he is.

Although he’s a very sought after guy in the glitzy world of Hollywood, your cardboard cutout Dwayne Johnson will always be right where you need him. Bring him to the kitchen to make breakfast, take him to class for moral support, keep him at the foot of your bed so he’s the last thing you see before you fall asleep, put him in your bed to lay on his cardboard chest. No matter what you do, he’ll be exactly where you left him.

4. He’s a cheap date.

When you go out to dinner, you won’t have to worry about a WWE-sized appetite. If it’s just the two of you, you’ll be able to just order enough for yourself and have your cardboard Dwayne Johnson watch you lovingly while you enjoy your food judgment-free (You could also probably get away with ordering for both of you which means that you get to consume both of the meals!). Plus, you’ll probably never have to worry about buying multiple movie tickets, theme park passes, or anything else that humans do when they go on dates together.

5. He's easy to transport.

Luckily for you, cardboard Dwayne Johnson will probably fit in a lot more spaces than real life Dwayne Johnson. Not only is he probably lighter than half of your textbooks, you can fold him up and manipulate him so that he can basically fit any of your transport needs. He can ride shotgun, probably fit in a suitcase, and even fit into just about any open seat in a form of public transportation. You might get some heads turned your way, but that’s definitely just because they’re jealous.

6. He will always protect you.

While he may have a kind, gentle, dandelion soul, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is one imposing dude. No one in their right mind would go up against him, especially if they wanna keep their bones intact. This is super helpful for when you’re worried for your safety. This cardboard cutout is great to stick in your living room window so no one tries to break into your home. Also, works for vehicles.

7. He will hold your stuff without getting insecure about his masculinity.

In other words, cardboard Dwayne won’t feel the need to assert his manhood if you briefly request his assistance in holding your purse. In fact, he’s basically made for that very purpose. He’d hold any scarves or necklaces you need without complaint. Dwayne Johnson doesn't have fragile anything, especially fragile masculinity.