Experiencing your first love is similar to boarding a roller coaster for the first time. You’ve heard others talk about the crazy ride, but have yet to experience it for yourself. Once you find the courage to strap in and take the next step, you then feel the excitement, the passion and the ups and downs that come with the craziest ride of your life. And just like that, the ride’s over, and there’s no way to get that first experience back. The moment was fleeting, but has forever left its mark on you. No matter how many times you board that roller coaster or try finding other rides that will evoke the same thrill, you never feel that way again. And from this moment on, you’ll never be the same.
Some people say that you never truly get over your first real love. Whether this person comes into your life in grade school or after years of experience in the dating world, there is nothing quite like the moment you meet the first person who first held your heart. No two love stories are alike or develop the same way, just as no heartbreak measures up to the first.
There are very few people who truly understand my first love story, but my closest friends know it like the back of their hands. In the first few weeks of high school, I fell for the first time without warning or a clue as to what I was getting myself into. After four years of high school and three years of college together, my love story had seen and been through more than most couples see in a lifetime with multiple significant others. For a while, I found myself to be the exception to the dating world. Rather than having to experience relationships with multiple men throughout my life, I found the right guy the first time around.
It’s strange trying to describe heartbreak, especially my own, in words. Even the countless number of Taylor Swift breakup songs don’t truly do the pain justice. Whether you are that person who buys a gallon of ice cream and watches reruns of "One Tree Hill," or makes themselves insanely busy to keep your mind off of it, we all deal with the pain differently. As unbearable as heartbreak can be, I think we can all agree that we eventually got by with a little help from our friends.
We may try to thank our friends for everything they have done for us in the event of heartbreak, but a simple "thank you" isn’t enough. If you were that person who helped a friend put their life back together or if you are the heartbroken struggling to find the right way to thank the ones who have been there for you, this one’s for you.
You were the first people I called when I could barely breathe or see out of my teary, swollen eyes. You didn’t have to ask what happened, for you already heard the heartbreak in my voice through the phone. Instead of asking me what happened, you sped over to my place and hugged me without saying a word. For that, I will be forever grateful.
You listened to me when I calmed down and explained everything when I was ready to actually say it. And you continued to do so when I couldn’t shut up about it. You gave me space when I needed it and the comfort of your presence when the loneliness became more than I could bear. For that, you'll never know how thankful I truly am.
You shoved food in my face on a regular basis and handled my sporadic crying fits like a professional therapist. You never once tried to pretend to know "exactly how I feel," because you knew you never could. You gave me a week to wear sweatpants to social gatherings and eat ice cream for breakfast, but after a while, you dragged me out with our friends. When others would ask "how I was holding up" or "how did it all go down," you screamed, “SHE'S FINE, NOW BUY HER A SHOT!" You already knew they were the people who only wanted the details of my breakup and didn't actually care about my well-being. For that, I could never repay you.
When I stopped talking about him altogether, you brought him up from time to time because you knew he was still constantly on my mind. You helped me realize that as much as I tried, a piece of my heart would always be his. In some small way, he would always be a part of my life, and I kind of hated him for that one.
But most importantly, you helped me realize how I will be okay. You helped me rediscover my worth, my interests and my talents that make me special and who I am. You reminded me of my strength, my independence, my goals for the future and all of the things I really want to get out of life. You taught me how to love myself for everything I am and how to let go of who I tried to be for him. Because of this experience and because of you, I am different. I am stronger. I’m the best possible version of myself. In that realization, I knew I would never be the same.
In the event of my first heartbreak, I thought I had lost “my person." Looking back now, I realize that I had several of them all along. I honestly don’t know if people ever truly get over their first love, but I do know that, with time, it teaches you who truly matters and who you can do without. Just as I said before, no heart ever breaks exactly the same way. Whether your "thank you" letter is completely different from mine, or if it matches up so well you start wondering if your friends contacted The Odyssey with your story, make sure to take the time to find a way to thank the ones who stood by your side. Never take the people who loved you at your darkest for granted and, most importantly, be the friend you would want there when heartbreak finds you.