You’ll probably never read this, but on the off chance that you do, there are some things you need to know...

It started off great. I was in a new place with new faces and new names. You were one of the first people I met, and at the time I had no idea what was in store for us. At first, I paid you no attention. You were just another new face, and I wasn’t particularly keen on letting people in. I would see you in passing on campus during the week and think nothing of it. You tried for weeks to get my attention. Once I figured out you liked me, everything changed. I never imagined someone like you would like me. Over the next few weeks, we began to hang out and talk more. You sent me sweet texts and wooed me with cute dates. It was obvious I was falling for you. How could this happen? Less than 3 months before I didn’t even know you existed. Over this time, you let me into your life, and I let you into mine. We shared secrets and told each other heart-wrenching stories. We stayed up late talking, crying, and laughing together. After a month and a half of chasing, dates, and hours of talking, I could feel everything gradually slipping away. I didn’t know how to feel or what to do. I wasn’t just losing a guy I liked, I was losing one of the few friends I had here. Eventually, we stopped talking altogether. Your texts stopped coming along with the smiles I once received in passing. You were cold and shut me out for some unknown reason. The few times we did talk were short and filled with lifeless conversation. I wasn’t prepared to be shut out or be blamed for my own pain. You contributed my pain to me being young and naïve. You never once took responsibility for how you made me feel. All I wanted was someone who cared about me.

Now, I still see you occasionally in passing. I’ve learned to be thankful for the moments we shared and to cherish every moment of life. You taught me that sometimes, it’s not me that’s in the wrong. You taught me that I am good enough. Ultimately, I learned how to love myself first and to do things for me instead of trying to please everyone else. Though the passion was short-lived, I learned how to take care of myself for the first time. I learned not everyone is who you think they are. I learned that, in time, I will find someone willing to take me in with all my flaws. You taught me a lot of things in just three short months. I’ll never forget that. In the words of Meredith Grey, “Sometimes the best we can do is try to feel it when it comes and let it go when we can.”