Let me tell you, Reader, two sidenotes before you start reading.
1. This isn't going to be some "Oh, please feel sorry for me, I'm
2. I've had two, almost three years to totally get over this. It does take time, but what they say is true: you really will be okay.
Dear Boy Who Broke My Heart,
First off, I want to thank you for giving me a chance. 15-year-old me isn't exactly what I would call cute and lovable, but you called me cute and loved me anyways. Thank you for looking past my self-dislike and my emotional core. I'm so appreciative of the fact that you didn't get out as fast as you could. Your looking past the negative aspects of my personality has helped me to truly appreciate myself more in the long run.
Secondly, thank you for spending quality time with me. Thank you for all the afternoons spent playing Xbox and watching movies and just hanging out with our families. I have never felt more loved by you than when we were doing nothing, but doing nothing together. Quality time is my love language, and I have discovered so, thanks to you.
I also want to thank you for the love letters. In this day and age, it's easy to make relationships all about social media. It's next to impossible to get on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, etc. without seeing somebody dedicating yet another post to their significant other. So I'd like to thank you for making our relationship more than just pixels on a screen. For leaving me letters in my locker or in my room or in the pocket of my jacket. I've never been one for surprises, but those surprises were welcome. You showed me what it's like to love and be loved in return. I can't wait to feel that again with my future husband, but it'll be a million times better because it's going to last forever.
But, on the downside, thanks for teaching me not to trust somebody too quickly. I let my guard down far too easily with you and I got far too comfortable. I had no idea what I was doing and next to no experience with a serious relationship. Next thing I know, nine months in, everything comes crashing down in the blink of an eye. Now I know to be more cautious and to step more lightly. You taught me to let my trust out in pieces instead of all at once.
Thank you for showing me that even though I always mean what I say, not everybody else necessarily does. You spent nine months promising to never hurt me, to never leave, to never give up. But you did all three. Now I know to not assume every word a person speaks is also a word they mean.
And most of all, thank you for breaking my heart. This isn't meant to sound sarcastic or snarky in any way. I am genuinely thankful you broke up with me because we weren't right for each other. If the breakup hadn't come when it did, it would've come later and hurt that much more. I also want to thank you for the lessons that came through you breaking my heart. I learned that it's okay to depend on other people to pick you up when you fall down. I learned how to deal with the heartbreaking knot-in-your-stomach kind of pain that comes when you watch the person you love(d) love somebody else the same way. Most importantly, you hurting me so badly kickstarted my relationship with Jesus. This, I am most grateful for.
Thank you for everything. I genuinely mean it. I'm glad that we're both moved on and happy, and I hope you are too.
Sincerely,
Me
