Last December, I had been toying with the thought of having a meaningful new years resolution, one that I could actually stick to. However, nothing really popped out as something worthwhile until I thought—what about simply being a happier person?
Since December, I have been following a few simple steps that have helped me achieve a happier and healthier mentality.
1. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Comparing yourself to others is the fastest way to stress, insecurity, and self-destruction. Especially when we live in a world that puts the external on a pedestal. People, having more followers on social media, or owning an expensive car, does not determine who has the better life.
Besides, those who appear to be living the perfect life are only showing what they want the world to see. Recognize that people only show off the best of themselves. No one sees the 50 ugly selfies leading up to the perfect one that received 1,000 likes! We always compare the worst factors of ourselves to the best ones of others, when quite frankly their life may not be as great as we've made it out to be.
There is no end to comparing yourself to others, it's a vicious, nasty cycle that can go on forever, but only if you allow it to. Comparing yourself to others puts too much focus and too much energy on someone else—you're not living their life—this is your life so take control of it. Stop regretting what you aren't and start appreciating what you are.
Focus inward and celebrate who you are!
2. Learn How to be Happy for Others
Recognize that everyone has their own unique strengths and weaknesses—therefore, some may excel in areas where you fail. However, instead of fixating, being jealous, and resenting them for their success, turn that negative energy into feeling happy for the person.
In turn, this positive mindset will allow you to focus more on yourself, while also helping you to better appreciate your strengths in a healthy way!
3. You Do Not Need the Approval of Others
This is your crazy, wonderful, fantastic life—and no one can take that from you! So who cares what people think. There will always be someone who judges you, it's inevitable. But if you're happy with the decisions you're making, then no one else matters!
Follow your gut and do you. Not everyone is meant to walk down the same path in life, so keep your head held high and be confident in the decisions you make.
4. Stop Complaining
If you don't like something that's going wrong in your life then change it! Do not idly sit by and mumble complaints about how upset you are. Nothing will ever change if you don't take charge.
If your roommate's side of the room is starting to look like a wasteland and it's irritating the crap out of you, do something! Ask them to clean! Don't complain to the girls down the hall and not take any action.
Therefore, there is no room for excuses. Excuses? They are simply ways for you to rationalize not taking action. Stop talking and start doing.
Have the mindset of "what can I do and how am I going to do it?" not "there's nothing I can do."
5. Body Image
Be comfortable in your own skin. Your opinion is the only one that matters. Your body is a temple, so don't let people graffiti all over it with their nasty opinions.
So, fix your posture and walk with a smile—if you feel confident and sexy in your own skin people will see that and respond in kind.
6. Set Goals
Have a reason to wake up in the morning and take on the day! Make a list of long- and short-term goals to keep you motivated.
Stop procrastinating. Live in the moment do something when it needs to be done. Stop putting it off until tomorrow—don't let one moment of your life be wasted. Maximizing your time will lower your stress levels and allow you more time to achieve your goals and do the things you love.
Make a plan to achieve your ideal life, execute, and stick to it.
7. Negative Energy
Life is full of energy, positive and negative. What you put out in to the world will come back around again, so don't fixate on the things that are bringing you down. Let things go and move on to something more positive.
That being said, try not to judge others. Even if you judge someone on impulse—stop and turn those negative thoughts into positive ones. We have absolutely no way of knowing everything that's going on in someone else's life, so who are we to judge?
Give off nothing but good vibes.
8. Perfect Half
You are not a half searching for your missing piece. The only person who can complete you, is you! You cannot be healthy and happy with another person unless you're happy with yourself, first.
Don't depend on someone else for happiness. At the end of the day, you're stuck with yourself and you're the only one who can make yourself happy. A relationship will not fill the void.
Regardless, there is no such thing as a perfect partner. Get rid of the image you've created in your head because it's stopping you from appreciating what's actually real and out there.
9. Surround Yourself with Positive People
Hold onto the friends who help you be the best version of yourself. Friends rub off on each other, so if you're constantly hanging out with negative people, chances are you too will have a negative mindset.
Find friends who have your back and want to see you succeed. Throughout life, there will be tons of people who want to see you fail. That's why it's vital to have true friends, the kind who will be there for life. Don't get caught up in the game of jealousy and popularity.
10. Expectations
Keep an open mind at all times. If you have no expectation, then you'll never be disappointed. Don't expect any result from a situation, just go along with the flow. This will allow you to live in the moment without any preconceived thoughts or judgments.
11. Realize Your Imperfections and Let Them Go
Maybe you're bossy, a control freak, or a neat freak—whatever your imperfection is, it is part of you. It is something that you need to accept and deal with.
Look inside yourself and recognize what it is, and then let it go. Do not dwell on it.
Do not let these things bring you down; no one is perfect and in the end these things help to make you who you are.
12. Be Honest
Don't say maybe to something when you want to say no. Focus inward, find out what you want, and go after it. Doing this and being honest will help you become a stronger person. People also respect those who speak the truth, therefore,it will also help to forge long-lasting relationships.