Phase 1: Discovering the lodge

Do you like to wear minimal clothing? Do you like confined, sweaty spaces? Do you like making out with strangers?

Congratulations, you've entered the first phase of Lodge—you're a curious freshman.

For those who don't know, a lodge is a noun meaning a small room filled to the brim with Natural Ice and damp humans. To lodge is a verb with multiple meanings dependent on theme. Most meanings involve X's on hands, "throwback" songs and the occasional regret.

Phase 2: Buying a Burnett's handle.

Some colleges drink Svedka, others Smirnoff, true Richmond students start with the same basic necessity—Burnett's. You're told it's a freshman thing, but quickly learn it's an impoverished college student thing. The second phase of the lodge is the Burnett's-ridden pre-game in LoRo B base. "One more shot, then we leave!"

Phase 3: The walk/crawl/Campus Loop to the lodge

The Campus Loop is in the distance. You try to make eye contact with the driver from the top of the lake, but Triceragoose blocks your view. Luckily, your lodge shoes (Converse or Vans circa middle-school) were made for this moment. And you're off. If you make it in time you become the hero of the night. Your friends will love you and you'll make out with that guy in your FYS that you make eye contact with occasionally. If you miss the Campus Loop, the first walk of shame within 24 hours begins.

Phase 4: The lodge

It's a blur of either tight and bright, 80s, Jungle Madness, Risky Business or Mathletes and Athletes. The sweet scent of staling beer encircles the tiled floor splattered in sludge. You dance with your girls, but slowly get separated from the pack. The Lodge is the only place where your friends can't accuse you of ditching them. Somehow you pop, lock and get dropped to an area of the dance floor where you don't recognize anyone. Then you make out with the first semi-familiar face. For your sake, I hope the one more shot was enough. Waking up from intoxication in the lodge is a dangerous potential. You leave the lodge wet with beer and sweat, on the brink of regret.

Phase 5: The stride of pride/wake up with your make-up

If you went home with him he'll be in every class until you graduate. Own that early morning bridge walk crawling with Yoga moms. If you wake up in your own room, your mascara will be by your chin and, no, you didn't shower before hopping into bed. Your tutu is still on.

Thankfully your regret will expire just in time for next Friday.