A typical monday morning at Purdue goes a little something like this:

7:20 a.m. First alarm goes off. I can never remember this even  happening. 

7:29 a.m. First snooze. Why is snoozing your phone so easy? I wish I never knew that pushing the top bottom turned it off. 

7:30 a.m. Second alarm. Never mind that I have a first one. What if that one never went off? 

7:38 a.m. First alarm snoozing for the second time. Sorry, roomie. 

7:39. a.m. Second alarm first snooze. Wait didn’t I turn off the alarm a second ago? Ugh I’m trying to sleep here. 

7:40 a.m. Third alarm going off. I mean the first two may have not gone off. Like really, you never know. 

7:47 a.m. First alarm is now going off for the third time. I completely turn it off because it is ruining my sleep. 

7:48 a.m. Second alarm going off again. I vaguely remember thinking about showering. It seems like a distant goal. 

7:49 a.m. Is this a joke? Turning it off. 

8 a.m. Next alarm. Snooze it. Bye. 

8:09 a.m. If I want a shower, I better get up. Snooze. 

8:18 a.m. I bet I can still shower if I sleep until the next time the alarm goes off. Yes, yes I can. 

8:27 a.m. Never mind the shower. I’ll braid my hair and toss on a cute headband. 

8:36 a.m. Alarms have now been going off for almost an hour and a half. How is it that I can’t get to sleep at night in complete silence, yet I can sleep beautifully during all of this sound? 

8:45 a.m. Roll over. Open one eye. Close it. I’ll just wear a hat. 

8:54 a.m. Okay, okay, I’m up. Refresh Instagram. 

8:58 a.m. Out of bed. I repeat, I am out of bed. 

9 a.m. Splash water on my face. Brush teeth. 

9:04 a.m. Attempt to put makeup on my puffy eyes. 

9:09 a.m. Hat on. Switch shirts. Body Spray is my best friend. 

9:11 a.m. Check bus schedule. It comes in one minute! 

9:12 a.m. Run outside and down all the steps. TA flies by me as I am running out into the street. People on board probably laughing.

9:13 a.m. Check bus schedule. Next one comes in eight minutes. Tight.

9:14 a.m. Sit on ground waiting for bus. Contemplate life and wonder why it’s so hard to just get out of bed. 

9:20 a.m. Get on the TA and do the math to see how long it will take to get to Beering. It will take 15 to17 minutes because we’ll be picking up all the people who just got out of their 8:30 a.m. 

9:22 a.m. Get off at the stop by SigEp. If you get off now and speed walk, you can make it on time or two minutes late. Maybe. 

9:25 a.m. Instantly regret this because you are sweating and your backpack is heavy. 

9:28 a.m. Trip on uneven sidewalk because you are walking so fast.

9:29 a.m. Do a little half skip to act like it was supposed to happen.

9:30 a.m. Okay, class is starting. Start to break into a little half run/half walk deal. 

9:32 a.m. The doors are in sight. I repeat, the doors are in sight. 

9:33 a.m. Get to the doors. 

9:34 a.m. Wipe off forehead sweat and slow breathing before casually walking into class. Rearrange your scarf. 

9:35 a.m. Arrive fashionably late. Wave to the professor.