The pregame planning

Girl: “Hey Hey girllllll! Pregame. My room. 10:30. I have the sickest pregame playlist and I got a bottle of watermelon Burnetts and some diet coke. What should I wear? What are you wearing? Is it a skirt night or a jeans night? What frat do you want to go to first? OMG so excited!”     

Guy: “Pregame after my class at 2. Handles to the face”     

The pregame

Girl: Dancing, yelling and gross shot-taking face. “So happy it’s Friday. Seriously had the worst week. I wanna get ratchet and hook up with hot guys. Do you think Mike will be there? I wanna hook up with him again but don’t want to seem crazy. But do you think he’ll be there? Do I look okay? How do my boobs look? Is this shirt too much? OMG I love this song! Let’s take more shots!”   

Guy: “Let’s get f****d up! I wonder if Jess will be there. She’s kinda crazy but an easy hook up. Guess I’ll text her if I don’t get with anyone else.”   

The walk to the bar    

Girl: The drunken wobble in heels in the middle of the street while screaming the lyrics to remix of “Ignition.”   

Guy: Walk to bar.

Bar

Girl: “Let’s do shots of fireball!” Let’s request Timber, I love that song!” Dance around in circles while messing up the lyrics to every song. Hands in the air, dropping it low and struggling to make it back up. “Oh my god there’s Mike. How is my hair? Is my eye makeup smudged? Is he looking over here? Is he dancing with someone else? Let’s dance closer to him.”

Guy: Walk into the bar like they own it. Make their way to bar and buy copious amounts of alcohol. Scope out the female scene. “Dude there’s Jess. She looks good tonight. Her friends are hot. I’m gonna get some tequila. Chicks love tequila.” Girl and guy: Shamelessly, drunkenly making out in the middle of the dance floor in the middle of the bar. 

Last call     

Girl: “I am not going home with him. I am NOT that kind of girl. He is going to have to work for it.”   

Guy: “Let’s go back to my place. I wanna hang out.”

Girl: “Okay!”      

The morning after    

Girl: Texts friends to let them know she is alive. Sneaks out quietly, picking up belongings on the way. Walks home, heels in hand and last night’s makeup and regret all over her face.   

Guy: Opens one eye to make sure she is gone. Rolls over and goes back to bed with a smile on his face.