The other day someone asked me what my plans were for Valentine’s Day. I paused for a minute to remember that February has started, and V-Day is on the horizon. I told this person that my plans were nonexistent, and I watched as their facial expression spoke volumes. How dare I not bask in the overrated and superficial excitement of Valentine’s Day, and all the hearts and flowers that come with it?
Whatever.
My previous relationships sucked, to say the least. I always imagined spending Valentine’s Day with a guy who simply adores me, and being pleasantly surprised to find that he has some sort of romantic arrangement for the two of us. I came down from that cloud very quickly. The only surprise of mine was that I was overwhelmingly disappointed, and I spent Valentine’s Day watching “chick-flicks” with my favorite Ben & Jerry’s ice cream – two guys who’ve never let me down thus far. For all the ladies and gents who have found themselves in similar positions on Valentine’s Day, this one is for you.
You are loved
With all the commotion over gifts, dinner reservations, and booking hotel suites, we often place our meaning of love into material things. The truth is that I am loved. Just because I don’t have a big brute of a man sweeping me off my feet (yet!) doesn’t mean that I am unloved. Instead of searching for affirmation from a significant other, why don’t you look around at the people who are there for you for the other 364 days of the year?
Relationships are overrated
It seems the only time people want to be in a relationship is when they see pictures on social media of cuddles snuggled up, and doing cute things. New Edition says it best: “Sunny days, everybody loves them, tell me baby can you stand the rain?” In essence, it is easy to be happy when things are going well, but when tough times hit, ask yourself, “Can I really weather the storm?”
Celebrate yourself
Waiting on my perfect guy to make the perfect plans for us on Valentine’s Day is like waiting on rain in a drought: useless and disappointing. How can I expect to be loved, if I don’t love myself first? In the few years that I have been single, I’ve essentially learned how to date myself. In the past, I’ve taken myself to the movies, to the salon, to the mall, out to dinner, and just about whatever else I wanted to do that day. Some might call it delusional, but I call it love.
Wherever you are, remember that there’s someone else in the world feeling exactly how you feel. Don’t let Valentine’s Day, or lack thereof, get you down! If no one tells you they love you on February 14th, then know that I love you.
