Remember when you were a new driver? Buckle your seatbelt. Adjust your mirrors. Make sure you can reach the pedals. You look over at your mom and see the panic flash in her eyes. One hand is desperately grasping the car handle above the door while the other grips the side of the passenger seat. You haven’t even moved the car out of the driveway yet. At the time, this might have seemed extra precautionary to you. But the first time you get in the passenger seat with a new driver, you’ll understand Mom’s reaction.

1. We’re going to back into a tree.

That large oak in the front yard? That’ll be the last thing you’ll ever see.

2. Watch out for the children, and the neighbor’s dog, and the mailboxes.

10 points if it's a person, 20 points for the cat.

3. Slow down, slow down, SLOW DOWN!

There’s no need to go 30 mph in a 25 mph, geez.

4. Check your blind spot.

Don’t turn your body, or let go of the wheel.

5. DON’T HIT THE CAR.

Change lanes if, and only if, the car is out of the way, completely.

6. Stop! You’re going to run the red light.

Desperately try to catch your breath as you narrowly escape the stoplight.

7. Park in between the lines, not on top of them.

Easy does it.

8. WE'RE GOING TO DIE.

This. Is. How. It. Ends.

9. Oh. That wasn't so bad.

Maybe they're getting the hang of it. Maybe.

10. NEVER MIND.

I take back everything I said.