Lent is about to begin again, and I can't wait to hear all about how people are giving up television, junk food, or soda -- said no one, ever. I love how when God calls us to give up something in order to better reflect on Him and become penitent, we give up something that we can very easily live without. Sure, the cravings for a sugary fix may be pretty intense, but not nearly as intense as truly fasting, which Jesus did for 40 days in the wilderness. I understand that, nowadays, we give up anything that may be a vice in order to try and purify us from sin. I also understand that gluttony and alcoholism, and other things people commonly give up, are real sins. Giving up those things entirely isn't the problem, it's when we give them up conditionally that we end up disgracing the sacred practice of the Lent season.

I am in no way bashing people who give up these things because they're actually a problem or a stumbling block in their faith. I'm commenting solely on the people who pick something easy to give up just to say that they're participating in Lent. I myself have been part of this halfhearted attempt to participate in Lent. The amount of junk food I ate was positively sinful last year. But this season, I want to be all in. So, I propose that people give up something in its entirety that creates a barrier between our hearts and God. If you want an example, here's what I'll be giving up: my need to have other peoples approval.

Ask anyone, even myself, and they'll say that I don't care what people think about me. At least, that's what I work so hard to make people think. I desperately want to be someone who has enough self-confidence to not care what other people think. I want to show others that I'm a great person because I can look past the world's labels that I'm given. Too bad even doing this is trying to becoming worthy in someone else's eyes.

Truthfully, I never stop wondering what people think about me. If I hear people giggling as I walk past, or whispering and looking even remotely in my general direction, I worry that they're talking about me. Maybe they don't like my hair or my clothing. Maybe I'm not pretty enough. It's an unending stream of harmful thoughts. I'm extremely self-conscious and will always look to others to measure how I feel about who I am as a person. I look to the number of friends I have and how many of them actually like my Instagram post. After all, what better way to see who really likes you than by the amount of likes on a stupid picture? I look at the fact that I'm single, still, and judge my appearance and my personality on that relationship status. After all, I'd rather go through multiple boyfriends who aren't the one than wait for who God really wants me to be with. All of my thoughts are generated based off of other people's reactions.

Sitting in Theology class, I was made aware of the fact that I am in fact made in the image of God. In fact, all humans are made in God's image. We were the best part of His creation, and the only part that he modeled after Himself. This means that when I look in the mirror and see all of these so-called mistakes, I'm looking at the image of God and berating it. I'm telling God that He didn't do a good enough job. When I look to others for my self-worth, I'm ignoring the fact that God loves me unconditionally and that His love is all I need in my life. When I think about the fact that I still don't have a boyfriend, I'm telling God that He isn't the only man I need in my life.

I'm constantly telling God that He isn't enough, and then looking to the world just to feel like I'm not enough. So, this Lent season, I'm going to give up this futile effort to gain the approval of others. I'm going to ignore the self-conscious thoughts I have when I hear people giggling as I walk past. I'm going to stop wishing that I had a boyfriend because I think it'll bring me happiness. I'm going to start looking in the mirror and thanking God for creating a beautiful person who reflects His image. It'll be hard-in fact it will probably be the hardest thing I have ever done, which is saying something because I've tried giving up soda before. All I know is that when Easter comes around this year, I don't want to look at what Jesus did on the cross and just shrug it off. I want to look at it and realize that He did it all for me, and that is the greatest proof or my value that I could ever find.