Congrats! You've made it through your first two semesters of college without flunking out or running out of money...hopefully. That's right, the first year is under your belt and it feels like forever ago that you were shopping at Bed Bath & Beyond for your comforter and decorations. Now suddenly your car is packed up even more to the brim than it was on move-in day (if that's even possible) and you're ready to welcome summer with open arms.
The school year flew by, but not without tears, laughs, pizza and changes. Everything about your freshman year of college revolves around change. You moved away from home for the first time, you shared a room with a stranger, you took classes that actually pertain to what you'd like to do the rest of your life, you made the most incredible friends and finally, you changed. And now that you’re home, you’ll realize just how much.
The second you pull into your driveway, you start to notice things. Your mom painted the front door, the dog lost five pounds (is that why you gained it?), your sister got taller and your family is making a new recipe for dinner. It seems hypocritical, in a way. You went away for a whole year to this unfamiliar place and expect to come home to the constant in your life, the one place that never changed in your memory. But then you're home, and you realize it’s all wrong. Because while you were living your life in a tiny dorm, life at home didn't stand still. You’d like to think life was on pause while you were gone, but it wasn’t. So now you're ready to enjoy the one place you can be your complete self just to find that you can't. And it’s not just home that’s changed.
The first day that everyone in your friend group is home, the major group text starts. The "where can we meet?" and "I've missed you so much," start to appear across your phone screen, followed by the "I have SO much to tell you" text that comes with a million emojis that probably mean things you forgot how to understand. So the best friends you've had since seventh grade all hang out just like old times. You sit through conversations of your friend recounting her crazy new party life, another friend explaining her eight new boyfriends, the third speaking about her new-found political and spiritual beliefs, and more. It seems that every single person has changed. In fact, they did.
Maybe you went off to a Christian school and gained a new perspective while one of your best friends went to a big state school and indulged in a very different lifestyle. Or maybe you were able to blossom a bit more, finding who you truly are, only to realize it isn't who everyone back home expects you to be. Regardless of where you came from and however many years of friendship are behind you, it's different now. So at the end of your conversation you return home sad and confused, lonelier than ever in the one place you knew for eighteen years as home.
This situation is not just you. It's not because your friend group was wrong all along or because of anything you did. Change happens. Because while you were at school and changing yourself, life was going on around you. Everything else was changing too. It's kind of a harsh reality, isn't it? It's hard to accept the fact that you just spent your entire year wanting to come home to your old life, to find it’s not there. It's scary, and I know that. But once you've realized everything has changed, you can finally accept it.
Jump right into the changes, instead of spending more time and energy denying it. Your friends changed, your house changed, you changed. It's okay. So maybe this summer you only have two friends to hang out with instead of your big friend group. Maybe you're mad that nothing seems to be going your way. Accept that your home is now just as unknown as your school was last August. If you can embrace the idea that everything is new, this summer will be alright.
With a plethora of change, this summer is going to be the biggest challenge yet, if you can believe it. But accept it. Embrace your new self and embrace your new home. Then, of course, get even more excited to return back to school in August.
