You might be familiar with the phrase, "Comparison is the thief of joy." 

This simple sentence is such a valid statement (especially for women) on so many levels. Comparison, abused, can steal a person's joy right out from under them. Have you ever considered comparison as the thief of relationships? How about as the thief of self-confidence? The thief of unity?

I'm no psychologist or theologian. I'm not a preacher, professor or philosopher, so if you're looking for an expert's theory on the big issues within our Greek systems, you may want to try a different article. I'm just a girl with the ability to put my opinions on the Internet. My credibility lies in the fact that I have now belonged to a sorority for three semesters, and that I love people and enjoy being friends with them. And my opinion about comparison is that it is quite possibly the single greatest source of destruction and disunity among groups of women.

There are about a billion ways comparison can destroy a sorority. Here are just a few.

1. Comparing self to others. Women are notorious for looking outward before looking inward. We examine the appearances, boyfriends, jobs, majors, senses of humor, popularity, faith lives, etc., of other individuals and then proceed to examine our own. Whenever this happens, we will always find shortcomings on our end. Believing in our own shortcomings results in the tragic, yet rapid, depletion of self-confidence -- not to mention jealousy, anger, bitterness and a whole host of other ugly emotions. A group of insecure females is about as dangerous as a land mine; it only takes one wrong step for everything to get blown out of proportion.

2. Comparing others to others. One major lesson I learned my sophomore year was that I need to stop think of my friends as a collective group. I can't use a blanket "friend protocol," whenever problems arise or celebrations are in order. My friends are unique, beautiful people who each have different needs and wants, relationally. Example: one friend may want me to listen while she vents about her awful day. Another may just want me to sit quietly with her as she inwardly puts the awful day behind her. We need to remember that individuals are just that. It's simply unfair to compare one relationship to another.

3. Comparing one group to another. A little friendly competition between sororities never killed anyone, or so we tell ourselves to justify the brutality that often ensues from said competition. Example: when did it become okay for groups to compete -- like a race... or the Hunger Games -- for potential new members? Shouldn't we be happy for our friends no matter where they end up, as long as they are happy and at home with their new sisters? Unity among Greek councils is such a vital part of campus life. How can the council relate well to other groups on campus if the council's infrastructure is unstable? 

4. Comparing self to group. This one is tricky, because it doesn't happen as often, but when it does happen, it's scary. Some of us never question our decision to join the sorority we joined. Others of us who were torn on bid day never stop wondering what it would be like had our minds gone the other direction that day. It's a sad truth, but there are sorority women who constantly agonize over whether or not they "fit in" with their group. I hate to break it to you, my friend -- whether you think you belong or not, once you're initiated, the deed is done. You have the power to choose to make the most of your situation and you can give your group the best version of yourself. You were given a bid for a reason, so go find that reason and own it! Similarly, if you know a sister struggles with feeling like an outsider, be compassionate. Reach out to her and let her know she's not alone. Be the reason she feels like she fits in!

The beautiful part about being in a sorority is that we are a bunch of random women and we are each worth celebrating. Some of us are loud, crazy, the life of the party. Some of us are sweet, quiet and more reserved. Some of us aren't comfortable speaking unless we're cracking a joke. Others of us need deep, serious conversations in order to feel a connection. I could go on and on. Humans are so cool. 

So, you see, comparing isn't worth our time. Focusing on being confident, bold women who love and encourage one another well -- this sounds to me like a much more exciting endeavor. I like being different from my sisters. I am done comparing. How about you?