After a night out last semester, I was riding home in a beeper and making small talk with a guy in the car with me. He asked me my major, and when I told him it was women's studies, he laughed and said, "Why!?" A million thoughts began to rush through my head. I could have told him he was rude or insensitive or uneducated or ignorant, but I decided to simply say, "Because there are still people like you who laugh when I answer that question." So yes, my badass answer did shut this one dude up, but this isn't an uncommon occurrence.
People don't take women's issues seriously. They just don't. Both men and women are afraid to identify as feminists because of the radical few who have made it seem like identifying as a feminist makes you a man-hater. The literal definition of feminism is, "The advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men." EQUALITY Y'ALL. So when you say you are a feminist, you aren't saying that you think women should be better than men or make more money than men or have more rights then men, you're saying that women should have the same chance at and access to all of the things men have. I have this kind of discussion with people a lot, and they'll say something like, "Yeah, I believe in equality for men and women, but I'm not a feminist." Yes. You. Are. Yes you are. That is what TRUE feminism is, but society has so totally skewed this new "F-word" that there have been times I've been nervous to admit to someone that I am a feminist because I worry they will think I hate men or think women are better than the rest.
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A popular argument against feminism these days is the good ole "I'm not oppressed so I don't need feminism." How about you tell that to the 11-year-old Texan girl who got raped by 18 men while the New York Times said she “dressed older than her age." Or to the 16-year-old girl from Ohio who got raped and filmed at a party by two boys, while CNN reporters talked about the bright futures of the rapists as athletes. Or how about to the 8-year-old girl who was married to a man 5 times her age, and died on the day of her wedding because she suffered from bleeding and uterine rupture after intercourse. There are countless stories like these, and two of these three happened in the United States. This isn't to discredit assault against men. It is very real and happens. But nearly one in five women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime. This isn't some far off mystery land where you and I aren't impacted; this is happening to our neighbors, sisters, brothers, and friends.
Feminism isn't just for women. Women's issues are men's issues, too. Men are constantly told to "man up" or "stop being a girl." Men, just like women, should be able to express (labeled as) "feminine emotion" without fear of being mocked or made fun of or even physically hurt by their peers. This is a feminism related issue. Or how about that white women make $0.77 to a man’s dollar, black women make about $0.68 to a man’s dollar, and Latina women make about $0.58 to a man’s dollar. Worse than that though, people with disabilities, including men, make $0.22 to the able-bodied man's dollar. This is a men's issue, as well as a women's issue, and therefore—a feminist issue.
There are people out there who have given feminism a bad name. They have made it seem like the feminist agenda is to become better, more powerful, and higher than men. This simply is not feminism. This is inequality. True feminism strives to make sure women and men have equal chances and opportunities in all aspects of life. If this is what you want, congratulations, you are a feminist.
Gloria Steinem once said, "The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off." I hope you're all good and pissed because it is time for change in this world—for all women and men.
