They aren’t worth it, dear.

They aren’t worth the pain.

They aren’t worth the constant anxiety, depression, fear, belittlement, anger, the hurtful things they say to you, the hurtful things that they do to you. You shouldn’t have to stay up until 3 am wondering how someone who is supposed to “love” and “care” about you makes so much of an effort to hurt you.

They only care about themselves.

They will constantly put their needs above yours. They will put their happiness over yours. They will put their feelings over yours. They will do things that will hurt you, intentionally or unintentionally. They put themselves first and then you become an afterthought. You deserve so much more than to be an option in their life. You deserve to be a priority. Don’t settle for anything less.

They will blame you.

They believe that their problems are because of everyone else but their own. They will blame you for their mistakes. They will blame you for the things that go wrong in their life whether you had anything to do with it or not. They will blame you for them failing a test or them fighting with their family. They will blame your for their depression or anger. It is not your fault. Their mistakes are not your fault. Their choices are not your fault. They chose the road that they walked down, not you.

They will blame anything else besides themselves.

They will blame the circumstances that they are in as a reason that they hurt you. They will tell you that the reason that they said those things or did those things was because they were stressed. They were just stressed. They were in a bad mood. They had a fight with their significant other. They had a fight with their parents or siblings. It’s because of this, or because of that.

They will lie to you.

They will tell you lie after lie, and the sad part is that they don’t have much remorse if any about it. They will convince themselves that they were doing it for you, to protect you. But in reality, they were doing it for themselves. They were lying to make themselves feel better.

Just because they apologize, doesn’t mean that they are sorry.

If they didn’t want to hurt you, they would change their behavior. “Sorry” doesn’t mean a thing if they are not willing to change their behavior. They would not continue to do the things that hurt you if they truly cared about you. They would not continue to apologize for the same things again and again and again. It’s like that broken plate analogy: throw a plate on the ground. Did it break? Of course. Now say you’re sorry. Did it do anything? No.

They will continue to take advantage of you if you let them.

They will take advantage of your love. They will take advantage of your forgiveness. They will take advantage of your patience. They will take advantage of you. You are worth so much more than that. You deserve people in your life who are going to cherish and uplift you, not tear you down.

Realize, you can’t fix them.

You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved. They will continue to do the things that they do until they decide for themselves that they want to change. All you can really do is pray for them. Pray for the Lord to work in their hearts.

Love isn’t supposed to make you fearful. It isn’t supposed to make you feel depressed. It isn’t supposed to make you feel unloved. It isn’t supposed to make you feel worn down. It isn’t supposed to make you feel drained, emotionally, mentally, physically, or spiritually.

You are worth so much more than that. So it is time to cut out the toxic people from your life. Burn bridges if you have to. Your mental health should not be compromised for a relationship whether it be a romantic relationship or a friendship.You do what is right for you. You have put this person first time and time again, now it is time for you to put yourself first for a change. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about you and want what’s best for you. No matter what, make sure you feel loved and show love. Whatever you do, don’t let them turn you bitter. Don’t do that to yourself. Every time you think a negative thought about them, say a silent prayer for them because they need it.

Remember, it is not your fault.