You’ve seen it before: the plot where a character’s mind is brainwashed so that the villain controls their thoughts even though everyone else thinks they are still them.
Well, imagine if this plot was a reality. No, I’m serious (and also not currently high while writing this). In fact, about 450 million people in the world are victims of this reality, and the rest of the world doesn’t always realize that they’re in trouble.
Depression (and most other mental illnesses) feels like there’s someone else inside your head trying to brainwash you, except a little different. At first, you can tell that something’s not quite right, and you tell yourself to just ignore those thoughts. You stay like that for a while because you still think everything’s okay. But slowly, it’s like the volume of the brainwasher’s voice is being turned up, and there’s no way to turn it down. And their voice and their thoughts become so loud that it drowns out everyone else (including yourself). You don’t want them in your head, you don’t want their thoughts to influence the way you feel and think, but you can’t control it.
Even so, you tell yourself that you can fight this, that you can make those thoughts go away because this isn’t a movie, this is real life and you’ve just been a little emotional lately, that’s all. But eventually, it reaches the point where you can’t tell which thoughts are yours and which are the brainwasher’s. You become lost within yourself, sometimes so lost that you don’t know how to find your way out and ask for help. Or you’re too scared that no one will believe that this wasn’t your choice, or that you will be judged for not having a good enough reason to feel this way.
No one chooses to be depressed. Whatever range of emotions or symptoms a person suffers because of their mental illness(es), they don't want to feel it. I mean, believing that 450 million people want to feel like shit every day of their lives is believing that 450 million people are forever stuck in their goth, emo, wake-me-up-inside phase. I don't know about you, but I don't think anyone wants to believe that.
If you ever find yourself or someone you love struggling with a mental illness, the best thing you can do is just be there for them. Support them. Validate their feelings. Understand that they don't want to have what they have, and they aren't just trying to get attention. Don’t try to “fix” them, or tell them they’re “stronger than that”, or God forbid, that children in Africa are dying. Help them find professional help or offer them your company whenever they need it. Do whatever you feel will be best for them with the understanding that their mental illness is not their choice, they don't want it, and they might not even know why they have it.
If you or someone you love needs help but doesn't want to reach out to someone you know, you can always call 911 if you are having a mental health emergency, or you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline-1‑800‑273‑TALK (8255).