Brother,
You’re growing up. I thought you’d be my baby brother forever, but somewhere along the way I lost track of time. I guess I realized it when you stopped ordering off the kid’s menu and knew how to use the computer better than me that you weren’t so little anymore. From board games to family vacations, to singing and dancing around the kitchen, we’ve had some memorable times together. As you’ve grown, so have I. Our priorities are on different pages and our lives are on entirely separate chapters. Despite this, we’ve managed to keep our bond. And since you’re growing up, there're a few things I want you to know.
It’s OK to not know what you’re doing,
That being said, it’s important to know who you are and who you want to be. If you wake up and realize you hate basketball, quit. Join soccer, student government, or chorus (you have a great voice in the shower, BTW), something that gives you purpose in your day. Quit your job and become an alpaca farmer. If it makes you happy and you can make a living, freaking go for it bro. You’re not going to figure it out on the first try, mistakes need to be made. I spent most of my life drinking McDonald’s milkshakes and not know they were 700 calories; we all make big mistakes (but screw you McDonald's for real).
Your friends are idiots.
Just like all boys your age are. Don’t take it personally, but you’re genetically designed to act dumber when there’s a larger group of you. You’ll do many stupid things and I can’t wait to hear about all about them. Just remember some consequences are more worth it than others. Know your limits and don’t let any other idiot try and push you beyond them. Never think it’s okay to call a girl a “bitch,” “slut,” or “whore” because all the guys in your group message did. You may think it’s innocent and meaningless, but imagine someone calling me that, or Mom because you like her better. Be friendly with everyone, but know who your real friends are. The best bromances are formed drinking shitty beer and playing Xbox in someone’s basement.
Someday you’ll meet a girl.
And you won’t know what the hell your feeling because you’ve never felt it before and you’re clueless. That’s okay, you’re not alone, all teenage boys are so incredibly awkward it hurts to watch. Listen when she speaks, know when to give advice and when to shut the hell up. Bring her flowers and ask her to dance. Tell her that she has beautiful eyes and make her chocolate chip pancakes (even if you burn them she’ll love you for trying). Invite her out with you and show her off to your friends. Most importantly, don’t break her heart, which is easier said than done. Believe it or not, you can end a relationship without hurting the other person. But if she breaks your heart, don’t worry, I’ll come with you to egg her car.
Be nice to Mom and Dad.
They’ve dealt with enough teenage angst; they don’t need more from you. We really are lucky to have great parents. It’s only when you escape their grasp that you begin to remember that. Keep giving mom hugs and letting her cheer out loud for you at basketball games. Don’t stop eating ice cream and watching "Jeopardy" with Dad, even though he thinks he knows all the answers. Give more than one-word answers at dinner when they ask about your day. As a tip, always sneak out the back and be careful because the door makes a lot of noise. They’ve both taught me how to work my ass off and how to be a more compassionate respectful human. As Mom always says, “Be the bigger person.” The simplest but best advice I’ve ever gotten.
Don’t settle for average.
There are so many ordinary things in this world, don’t let yourself be one of them. There’s enough men out there that assume they should get respect, be a man that actually deserves it. Overuse “please” and “thank you.” Learn how to give a firm handshake and look people in the eyes when you talk to them. Leave a restaurant if you don’t like anything on the menu. Travel anywhere and everywhere you can. Buy nice cologne and stop using Axe. Upgrade to Spotify Premium 'cause you’re a freaking rebel. But just please please promise me you won’t wish any days away, even the boring, irrelevant ones, you’ll look back and wish you appreciated them more. I’m really proud of the man you’re becoming, even if I don’t tell you enough.
But if you learn anything at all from me it’s this: life’s way too short to say no to pizza.
Love,
Your Older Sister