He is perfect. This guy is smart, funny, handsome and always makes me happy. I know I'm going to end up marrying this guy because no one, and I mean no one can outdo him. Our connection is so tight and no one will ever break it. We were destined to find each other and his love is incomparable. All my friends like him and they look up to us, yeah we're 'that couple' everyone wants to be like. Every other guy played me and hurt me but he will never hurt me.
Then he did.
Ladies we all go through some form of breakup at least once in our life and it sucks. That stinging in our heart and those tears falling down our face is extremely exhausting and every time you go through a breakup you feel like the world is coming down on you. Then you start putting things in your head like;
Why did this have to happen to me?
What's wrong with me?
What if he cheated?
Am I not enough?
I am never going to be happy.
I am never going to find someone like him.
STOP. AND JUST BREATHE.
I know it is so easy to question every moment you two spent with one another. I know it's so easy to feel like you weren't pretty enough. I know it's so easy to tear yourself down because the guy who made you feel like everything, ended up making you feel like nothing.
But guess what? You were fine before him and you will be after.
Sure those moments were beautiful and you should cherish them for however long you feel like. But remember there was a reason the breakup occurred and you should not trap yourself with sadness.
As Theresa Russo from Wizard Of Waverly Place says " you're gonna fall in love so many times before you find the one you'll be with forever. So, think of it this way: you're just one broken heart closer to happily ever after". Yes, it sucks that life works out that way. But you're going to end up with someone better because you learned about yourself and others in the process. Now you know what to look for. Now you are stronger. Now you are wiser. And guess what? You are still good enough.
Anyone will be lucky to have someone like you and don't ever think otherwise.
You may argue, he was the only reason you were happy. Wrong. There are so many other reasons to be happy, for one, you're healthy, you may have friends and family who love you unconditionally and you can find another source of happiness. Happiness is not limited, it's endless.
Okay so maybe he got you out of a runt when you both met. But guess what? There are other people, other things and other hobbies that can help you too. Not to mention, you have you.
You may even say there's no one like him. True, but there is better. With over 7 billion people on this earth, you're sure to find many people with the same qualities and there is that person just for you. You have to remember comparison is the thief of happiness, so don't compare your ex with everyone else.
"But he was my first__". Okay, there's going to be a lot of first for everything most of which certainly won't be the last.
"Well I don't remember what I was like before him", so work on that. Who were you before you met this guy. My guess, a strong independent woman. You didn't lose yourself in the relationship, and if you think you did thankfully that relationship ended.
You had a life before he showed up in it, and that life is still alive you can make it better.
I know it hurts a lot. That's why it's called being heartbroken, but there is so much out there that can mend those pieces. At the end of the day, you have to love yourself. Because that confidence and self-love is beautiful and is one of the most attractive features you have. You are enough, and the right person is going to realize that from the start. And when you find that right person, you're going to realize how much more amazing they are. How much more supportive and loving they are. They will be more and so will you.
Don't think of it as wasted time, because you learned something in the end. I know it may feel impossible to move on after this, but you can and you will.