No one has ever been born perfect and no one has ever died perfect, yet both events have witnessed beautiful people. Beauty is inherently not perfect, because of our rapidly changing ideals that paint our bodies and souls. I think we can all agree that regardless of the beauty evident from merely looking at a person, no one can be truly beautiful if they are not pleasant to be around. No, I'm not here to say that if you find yourself throwing sass around a bit too often then you're hideous; however, there is a lesson to be learned here. A face can launch one thousand ships, but a bad attitude can sink dozens of fleets.
You don't have to take it from me at face value. Psychology Today outlines the illusory advantages of playing the heavy-handed blame game in your life with the statement, "Finger-pointing provides a convenient justification for life’s unsatisfactory conditions, and sheds the work necessary to take complete charge of one’s own life and well-being. However, habitual blaming over time perpetuates bitterness, resentment, and powerlessness, as the victim suffers from what H.D. Thoreau calls quiet desperation." There you have it, folks. How are you supposed to grow as an individual if you're constantly blaming others for the situation that you're in? Your bitterness isn't going to help that guy you like care. It isn't going to make your career magically better. It won't even make your life nicer in the long run. In fact, you're more likely to live with serious illness if you continuously embark on the bitter train.
Multiple studies have found correlations between chronic negative attitudes and one's overall happiness, health, and well-being. Concordia University researchers revealed that the biological dis-regulation that accompanies your grumpy butt hampers your metabolism, immune response, and even your organ function. Truly, as John Milton once said, "the mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven." I feel that a significant question to ask yourself right now is whether or not your attitude is making your life more difficult. Everyone is guilty of it, but some people never grow into better versions of themselves because of these actions.
These people are sometimes labelled with the prospective, but not yet official, diagnosis of post-traumatic embitterment disorder (PTED). That's right. There's a name for that lovable scamp in your life that keeps a folder full of screenshots from their ex (highlighted and collated, obviously) ready to pull out at parties. The Canadian Institutes of Health Research and the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada supports a comprehensive treatment to combat this phenomenon- a multifaceted approach of removing oneself from fruitless efforts, involving oneself in an equally meaningful endeavor, and forgiving those that are blamed.
When it comes down to it, the only one that can stop you from sinking in negativity is yourself. You have to take responsibility for your actions, forgive those you feel have wronged you, and engage different goals. Isn't it worth it in the end, though? Happiness can be difficult to attain, but similarly to the fashion in which you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, you can be happier if you are a nice person.
In the words of Vaudeville star Edgar Bergen, "Who'd have thunk it?"
