I grew up a first-generation Indian American, and there were always certain ideas and views about American culture my parents would not see eye-to-eye with. And it makes sense considering they came all the way from India for us to have a better life. I applaud that considering how hard it must be to move halfway across the world. It just comes to show how much our parents love us, right?
But admit it: there are some things Indian parents do or make us do, and here’s a list of things (almost) every Indian American has gone through:
1. Your parents put you in a classical singing, classical instrument and/or classical dance class since you were a toddler.
Whether you liked it or not, your parents have at least attempted to put you into one of these three categories without fail.
2. You wake up on the weekends to the sound of a pressure cooker or clashing dishes.
Ah, nothing beats waking up from a good night’s sleep after a long Friday night to the wonderful melody of your mom cooking daal while your dad is washing the dishes and both of them yelling at you to wake up.
3. Your parents explaining how much harder life was in India when they were your age.
I always come home complaining about how tiring the two hours of commute I go through for college is, and, without fail, my dad tells me how he used to walk five kilometers from his home to his school every day.
4. You speak in your Indian language when certain circumstances arise.
You know exactly what I’m talking about: talking in the Indian language you grew up with to smack talk someone (so they don’t understand what you're saying or use it as an excuse to curse). But this backfires terribly when that person knows the language too...
5. You do or attend a Pooja no matter what time of day.
From the frantic night-before shopping to get Pooja flowers, buying camphor and preparing the Prasadam (and other foods) to positioning the idol whom you are worshiping in some deranged corner of the house at 3:30 a.m. Because it’s the only place that can be positioned East and is the "auspicious time."
6. Your parents comparing you to your friends and relatives.
In a typical Indian parent’s mind, this is supposed to act as an incentive to get better grades or be grateful by always comparing you to that one friend who studied better or that one relative who got into a great college. I mean who cares if that person deal drugs when they have a 4.5 GPA, right?
7. You never got “the talk."
Considering that my dad fast-forwards through every sensual scene in a movie, I have never gotten the birds and the bees talk. I’m too concerned about making sure my parents don’t find out about that one test I failed (or didn’t fail, if my parents or relatives are reading this).
8. Your parents think an Indian movie playing in an American theater actually has an intermission when it’s the part of a movie that says “Intermission."
It never gets old to see how many times my parents fall for this.
9. You have to fight your right to be able to wear dresses, sleeveless tops and/or shorts.
It’s no big deal if a sari basically shows off your whole stomach and its low-back. Or if your low-necked blouse is extremely tight thanks to that one tailor in India that awkwardly measured your boobs while your mom was anxiously watching you get fitted. But all hell raises if you show even the slightest bit of your leg because that’s “shame shame puppy shame."
10. Going to arangetrams and other dance or singing performances are second nature.
It's real when you know almost every song the dancer is dancing to and just naturally do the taalam with it.
11. You show up to any place extremely late.
If a party starts at 6:30, it’s fashionably late to show up at around 7:00. But let’s be real, it’s not like they call it Indian Standard Time for nothing. You know the party doesn’t start until the desi guests start rolling around at 8:45 (Remember that this rule only applies to being with relatives, because you know hanging out with your friends is a complete waste of time that should be used for only studying.).
12. Your parents buy pirated Indian movies.
The quality of some guy constantly shaking his iPhone 4 while recording the movie at the theater with people cheering in the background is just unbeatable and totally worth the $10.
13. Your relatives ask you what your plans are for the future.
“Where are you going to college," “What are you going to do 10 years from now,” and, of course, “Are you going to be a doctor or engineer?” are questions literally every Indian has been asked because, of course, I know when I’m going to have kids at the age of seventeen.
14. You pronounce your name in the most whitewashed way possible.
I mean it’s not your fault, you just do this to prevent the embarrassment your teacher or sub will inevitably put you under when they are taking attendance.
15. You have insane amounts of privacy settings on all your social media.
You're all too familiar about that awkward moment when your parents ask you why you didn’t accept their request or why they can’t see anything you post.
