Last weekend I had the wonderful opportunity in attending a wedding. While everything there was perfect, I didn’t like it.
And here's why.
Like I said, the wedding was perfect. Everything from the food to decorations was beyond perfect. And I’m pretty sure I was depressed at the wedding.
Depressed you ask? Yes I was depressed.
Depressed because the wedding was so fancy, expensive, and again, very perfect that it reminded me how poor I was. I’ve been to plenty of weddings in the past and this one was undoubtedly my favorite one. Now, this wedding was not a Christian wedding with the white wedding dress and all, this was a Desi wedding. And there are a few things that are need to be known about the desi weddings. For starters, desi weddings are known for being big.
To me, I find that it’s hard to have a desi wedding and not make it big. Indians, Pakistanis, and Bangladeshis tend to typically have really big family and friend circles, and there always seems to be a need to invite everyone and anyone. Don’t be surprised if you get an invite even if you aren’t close to the bride/groom. - It’s a common practice! I say to think of a desi wedding a combination of a family, school, and college reunion.
We also need to understand that desi weddings extend for multiple days. On average it lasts three days, There is a holud tradition on the first day. This is when the bride and groom are covered in a turmeric paste by family and friends that can be accompanied by henna designs on the bride and her friends along with a fun night of dancing. The second tradition is the wedding, where the actual marriage ceremony occurs. The third day is the reception which in my eyes is just an event for all the guests who couldn’t attend the other days. There is still food and dancing though. Depending on culture and religion, there can be more events.
See the bill adding up much? While the price tag can vary, desi families take a lot of pride in their weddings, and are usually prepared to allocate a chunk of money to the cause. So get this, according to fortune.com, the average American wedding costs $29,000 and has 140 guests while the average desi wedding is $65,000 with 500 guests. In fact, the desi wedding industry is a booming business estimated annually between $4 and $5 billion.
Is the wedding made out of diamonds? It can be, but that’s not what contributes to the bill. We’ve already established that there are tons of guests and several events, so imagine all the venue reservations. And then there are endless food options from appetizers to take home goodies. The bride and groom have endless outfit options and not to mention that close family and friends also get gifts. The venues need decorations and professional photographers and videographers. Honeymoon money is also factored into this. With a possible horse or an elephant. So the bill really does add up quickly.
The same article from Fortune.com says that desi weddings keep getting fatter and bigger. `
While the extravagance may seem a little extreme (and it totally is), I couldn’t imagine these weddings any other way. And considering that my knot will be tied in the future, I probably should be saving the pennies now!