You Don't Have To "Love Yourself First" | The Odyssey Online
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Health and Wellness

You Don't Have To "Love Yourself First"

You deserve love, too.

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You Don't Have To "Love Yourself First"
Jeffrey Davis Jr.

Everyone has heard someone in their life say it: "You'll never be ready for a relationship unless you love yourself first." And while I am one to push for self-love and self-acceptance, I also know there are times when even the most confident people question themselves. There is not a single person who can say they feel 100% confident in themselves 100% of the time. It's just human nature to have doubt.

But every time you tell someone, "You need to love yourself first," or "Things will work out so much better for you if you learn to love yourself before you try to love someone else," you are telling a human being they are not worthy of love until they reach a certain point. You are telling them they cannot love another person. And to me, that is not fair in the slightest.

No one gets to decide who is worthy of love and caring, no one can tell a person they don't deserve love or their relationships won't work out because of a lack of self-love. These people struggling to accept themselves may not need the confidence, but they definitely need support from others; whether that be friends, relationships, family, etc. These people need to be loved.

Next time you see someone struggling in a relationship, don't jump to saying "If you loved yourself, you'd be in a much better place". It doesn't help. Encourage those around you who are struggling. Everyone is deserving of love, even if they don't love themselves. How is anyone supposed to know how to love without an example? Be kind, love those who don't love themselves, they need it the most.

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