I remember how it felt… the day that boy walked out. I was so shattered. I couldn’t even mask the hurt because there was so much of it. I was mad. I was mad at him, for breaking promises and for leaving when he said he wouldn’t. I was mad at the world for going on about itself while I felt like I couldn’t move. I was mad at my friends and family for being able to laugh and smile and actually mean it, because I wasn’t able to do that. I was mad at EVERYTHING and EVERYONE. Mostly, though, I was angry with God. I prayed so hard for that man and our relationship. I did everything I should have.

I fought for us. Hard. I was faithful. I did everything I could to keep us afloat. I didn’t stop going to church, I didn’t drop out of school, and I didn’t drop everything and run away with him. Why would God let this happen? Why did I deserve this? About a week before our relationship fell through, I was having coffee with a very sweet friend of mine. I had been gushing about how perfect everything was, and how good he treated me. She only had one question for me: “Is he a believer?” I explained to her that he wasn’t, but that I was praying so hard for him. I just knew that I would be the one to bring him to Christ, and it would make our relationship that much closer. I continued to argue my point, that it didn’t matter, because I knew who I was in Christ, and regardless of his beliefs, I would never stop loving Jesus. That part was true, but what wasn’t true, and what I couldn’t grasp at the time, was that him not loving God like I did, did matter, a lot.

One week later everything ended in flames, and I was angry and I had no idea what I had done wrong. I was so determined to figure out what I had to do to fix things, so I turned to the one thing I knew would tell me the truth. My bible. I used my bible app on my phone, and I typed in the search box the word “relationship." Every verse that was relevant to two people, all had something in common. Every successful relationship involved both people loving Jesus. Moreover, they involved both people putting God first -- Before themselves, and before the relationship in general. I kept reading and I kept scrolling, trying to find something relative to my situation, and I couldn’t.

Instead, the Lord showed me a verse on something I’d never heard of: Unequally yoked relationships. The verse he showed me was 2 Corinthians 6:14, which pertains to every type of relationship, not just the romantic ones. 2 Corinthians 6:14, (NIV) “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” BOOM. There I was at three in the morning with tears all over my face, and I had my answer. It didn’t work because he didn’t love God the way I did. The one factor I was positive wouldn’t get in the way, ended up being the exact thing that tore us down.

But where do I go from there? What do I do now? How do I make myself feel better and learn from this situation? Pray. So now, I pray for that boy, because I still love him, and when the anger finally fell away, I realized that some other girl could be in my place one day, so I pray that he falls in love with Jesus so that she will be able to have a beautifully successful, Christ-centered relationship with him one day. But even more than that, I pray for my future husband that GOD will send me. I pray that when we meet, it’s only by a circumstance that God could have arranged.

It will be beautiful, so I’ll be kind to myself, and be patient, because a man who fears the Lord is worth waiting on. God loves us so much, and he isn’t gonna let us give our hearts away to just anyone. He wants them to be protected by a man who knows the power of prayer, and by a man who knows the true definition of love.

I encourage every girl out there to do what I am learning to do every day, and that’s to lean on God to send you your perfect match. That is the only way your relationship will ever work. So until then, keep loving Jesus with all you’ve got, and be proud of who you are and where you’re going. Someday soon, that Jesus loving boy of yours will walk into your life, and he’ll never walk out.