I understand why my grandfather is a silent man. Everything you say can be held against you and sooner or later, it actually will be. People you thought were your closest friends will turn around and stab you right in the chest at the least expected moment. You can trust me, but I'll screenshot every rant you've ever had and send it to the person you were talking about. They often forget to add that clause onto their statement, don't they? You can trust me, but only because I want to have dirt on you in case you try to stop being my friend. Another common note we didn't read in the small print. My grandfather is an intelligent, hilarious man. He never speaks about what happened ten years ago and he won't peep a word about what happened yesterday. He addresses the here and now in the moment, often providing advice and making jokes, but never saying a negative word against anyone even though you can tell he is displeased. He is humble and loving.

And he's no fool. He can sense when a person has ill intentions and is a negative influence. He learns how to handle that person and is able to make sure he or she does not cause any harm to our family. I admire him so much. I wish I could be like my grandfather so that I would be able to foresee the hurt I was about to inflict on myself by choosing the wrong friends.

Friends are supposed to be there with you through your darkest of times, but also your brightest. They're your biggest supporters and cheerleaders, but there are allowed to be disagreements and boundaries at the same time. I believe we all forget that: you can disagree and be angry at your friend for something he or she has done. When I trust you as my friend, when you tell me that I can trust you, I don't expect there to be clause on it. I don't have one on my words. Why is there one on yours?

So when you took my lowest of moments and screenshotted them, cropped them and sent them to the one I talked about, I was hurt. You sent them to the people I was speaking about, but you left out everything you said or the situation in general that caused my anger. I couldn't believe that you did that. You told me I could trust you and I did. I trusted you in my darkest moments and you revealed it to the people I had no trust for to make me not only look horrific, but to also gain attention for yourself and gain their trust. Little do they know that when their trust is gained and they vent, you'll be manipulative and repeat the same cycle to them. It's your game of winning people over for a temporary amount of time and you do play it well.

I'm still in shock being as I slept for three hours, woke up and this entire situation happened. I was excommunicated from our "family" of friends for words that you cropped that I did, in fact, type. Words that I trusted you with. I am both horrified that I said any of it, but just as bewildered that you would have told anyone. We are, after all, adults, aren't we? While we're being adults and playing "fair", you also failed to mention what you had originally stated in those screenshots. You didn't add in the image where you said you hated her, did you? Didn't think so. You also haven't held anyone else accountable to their actions which proves, once again, that you are doing this purely for the attention of others and to gain a "hero" reputation for "exposing" me.

I know it may seem hypocritical that I'm angry at you for revealing my most childish of actions and words, but I bettered myself. I held onto your secrets tightly and never let them go. I actually improved my relationships with others and settled any faults we had, but that wasn't enough for you. You had to ruin everything. Again.

You aren't my friend. You're not their friend either. They'll realize it after time. You're just doing what benefits you in the moment. I can't trust you and because of you, I will never trust people again. I will learn how to steadily become more and more like my grandfather and maybe he had to learn how to become himself the way that I am. Through many heartbreaks and the mistrust of others. For now, I'm going to recover from the panic attack you set off, love the real friends I have (shoutout to Ethan, Cheyenne, Donna, Elizabeth, Noelle and Hunter) make some coffee and continue to enjoy my wonderful life.