Sometimes I find that I shouldn't say what I think- such as when I know a big spiritual experience is coming, so I say that trials will be heading my way. Although my trials have been stressful, I always find myself thinking with the excitement of the spiritual experiences to come.
So as I continue to look for things that are inconveniently missing, and try to balance the financial life of a college student, I find myself looking at the future with optimism.
Maybe this is why a midnight phone call from a good friend caught me by surprise. We hadn't talked very much over the summer, and I wasn't expecting to hear from them. My surprise was palpable when my friend and I diverged from the main point of our conversation, and they admitted that they felt as though they had sinned beyond redemption, as though nothing they ever did would allow them to regain their former happiness.
In the past day, I've thought about that and my immediate response to my friend's doubts and fears. No mistake is too big for you to come back from. The fear and doubt that you feel is coming from someone who never wants you to get better, never wants you to find what you've lost. Those fears and doubts come from the devil himself, who is sending those lies your way to block an undeniable truth: You can always get better, and there is always hope.
Having been through hard times, filled with doubt and fear, I can understand why people such as my friend feel like there is no way to climb out of the holes that they have dug for themselves. Reclaiming a sense of self that you feel you have lost is painful and difficult, and can truly seem insurmountable.
As I gave advice to my friend, I tried to remind them that each of us has been blessed with the ability to change. We may have made mistakes, we may have sinned, we may have lost our way, but through the power of God, we are able to repent and return to him. There is nothing we can do in this life that is not beyond our power to repent of.
Like a flower growing through a crack in the sidewalk, we can push through the barriers that have been built up around us. As someone who is deeply religious, I believe that Jesus Christ, the Savior of all mankind, provided a way for each of us to come back from what may have been the very deepest and darkest areas of hell.
Without that great and atoning sacrifice, maybe the fears experienced by my friend and others would come to pass, but through the grace of God, it is not so. We can all learn from past mistakes, and grow to become the person that we aspire to be. We can always come back from places of darkness and strive to reach the greatest light.
It can seem impossible, and our road will be littered with difficult choices, but each and every one of us has been given an incredible opportunity. When those fears and doubts come knocking at the door of our hearts, we can push them away, lock them outside, and remember that we can always get better. After all, the best is yet to come.