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You Are Not Alone

Learn to love yourself.

Grace Van Dyck

Nov 08, 2016

Dean College

Pexels

In life, it is quite easy to find yourself feeling alone. You may not have many friends, or at least that is what you think, or you might have a lot of friends but do not feel as if they are not your real friends. You might find yourself wishing you were that extroverted girl who is always walking around the halls with her squad. You might want to be the "pretty and popular girl" who wins best everything in high school. No matter who you want to be, you're comparing yourself to others. Often during this time, you feel alone, like you are the only one going through this struggle. But I am here to tell you that you are not alone.

I am not just some popular girl being empathetic towards you because I have always felt like that girl. All throughout my public school years, I felt invisible. I did not fit in, I was excluded, and so I put myself down a lot. I put myself down to the point of depression and suicidal thoughts. The fact that I had two cancer surgeries and the fact that I am visually impaired did not help my case, let me tell you. So I have always felt like the outcast. I was questioning why I was who I was, and I did not want to be this visually impaired, cancer survivor girl. I was in denial, so let's just say that I was in a bad place. Not even Parks & Recreation could pull me out of this funk. That's when you know you really have it bad!

Luckily, I am far beyond that dark place now! I'm here to tell you, no matter how cliche this is, life does get better out of high school. This does not mean that life is all butterflies and sunshine all the time; heck no. College and beyond definitely has its struggles, and I have felt alone in college sometimes too. But I have made so many great friends in college and I feel so blessed right now to be doing all these leadership opportunities and to have the friends that I have. I'm still not the girl who walks with a bunch of girls in the hallway, but I love that because I am an introvert so I need my space. I have come to love myself and who I am, and I am proud of myself for that.

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You Are Not Alone

Learn to love yourself.

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All names should be "unisex names."

1. Communicating via email can be awkward.

2. Appointments usually accompany weird looks.

3. Introducing yourself to someone is never without a hitch.

4. You’ve probably thought about changing your name.

5. You’re often asked why you have the name you do.

6. You get excited when you meet someone of your gender with your name.

7. You feel awkward when you meet someone of the opposite gender with your name.

8. You’ve had someone say to you, “I knew a [your name], but they were [your opposite gender].”

9. You’ve heard a bad joke/pick-up line or two about your name before.

10. People are surprised when they see you.

11. You’re extra sensitive to other unique or unisex names.

12. You’ve fought with your parents about it.

13. All things considered, you’re happy your name makes you unique.

You know that all of these things apply to you. You'll just never tell.

I get it... I'm pale.

1. At least I can't lose you in a crowd!

2. Oh my goodness your skin is like glow-in-the-dark.

3. Can't you just get fake tan?

4. Do you tan or just burn?

5. Your kids are going to look like Casper the Friendly Ghost!

6. *holds arm against your arm* Look how much darker I am compared to you!

7. *holds pale arm against another pale arm* Aw, at least you're darker than her!

8. I laid out by the pool almost every day over break!

9. I haven't used sunscreen since I was, like, five.

10. *adjusts selfie lighting to their face* Oops, where'd you go??

11. *after working out* Your face is SO red!

12. *wears white* Look! You're all one color!

13. You need to get some sun.

14. Aren't you excited for summer?

The struggle bus is real.

1. Child prodigies:

2. Hearing other musicians in the practice room next door and accepting that you will never be as talented as them:

3. That anxiety that takes over before every performance:

4. Taking a million 0 credit classes:

5. When there's a paper due the next day, but you have to attend yet another concert in order to pass a 0 credit class:

6. When your friends try to encourage you after a performance, even though you are criticizing everything in your mind:

7. Knowing that there's always that one professor during juries:

8. The oh-so-attractive band/choir uniforms:

9. Realizing that a college campus is maybe not the best atmosphere to finish your latest composition:

10. Hearing "Oh, you sing opera? I LOVE Phantom of the Opera!" for the hundredth time:

11. When people think finals week is a breeze for you.

12. When you're drowning in the stress that comes with 18+ credits (and not to mention all those 0 credit classes) and people ask you how you are:

13. When it all comes down to it, though, you know that at the end of the day, music is your passion:

Because you need it in your life.

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6. holds arm against your arm Look how much darker I am compared to you!

7. holds pale arm against another pale arm Aw, at least you're darker than her!

10. adjusts selfie lighting to their face Oops, where'd you go??

11. after working out Your face is SO red!

12. wears white Look! You're all one color!