Dear Girl Who Needs To Be More Confident In Herself,

Sometimes there comes a day when you feel like you can rule the world with your positive attitude, but then in that next moment, you feel suddenly empty.You need to know that being confident is not about the looks, but building a stronger version of yourself. You are never not good enough for anybody, and if no one realizes how special and unique you are; then it's their loss.

You need to focus on yourself, and not worry what others think of you. You need to believe, that you can do anything you set your mind to. Like I said, being confident takes time, it does not come right away. I learned that the hard way; thinking that I was certain about everything.

To begin with, confidence is key in how you want to show yourself off to the world. Again, you should never have to compare yourself to someone; just because they have the outer beauty and looks you’ll never have. You are your own person, and you should never change for somebody just because they will like you more. Even if it's for a boy that you’ve been talking to, or just casually hanging out with they are not one to define the type of person you aspire to be. Yes, having a boy around may boost your self-esteem and confidence, but that shouldn’t define any standards of being a completely different person around him. I have been where you are, trust me, getting caught up in the scene of having someone around all the time and liking you for all sorts of reasons is great. There were times I even became blindsided by the fact how I got caught up with the idea of being in love; I completely forgot who I was since it made me feel alive for once. I thought I would never experience this type of “feeling”. This feeling of being wanted felt amazing, so, therefore I felt better like a better version of myself and the girl I wanted to be. But then I soon realized all those times, I thought this boy was actually into me for being the kind and genuine girl soon turned into a false reality. This learning experience has taught me that you should not allow a guy, or anyone for that matter, define the person you are because you are you and that should be enough.

I admit, that there have been times I’ve been lost and self-conscious, and so I really didn’t know who I was. It is a part of life we all have to come to face and deal with.

You need to keep a positive attitude and just focus on yourself and know what is best for you.

As I reached my college days, I always struggled with the fact of being confident in my body and myself. Yes, I had days where I felt amazing, but sometimes I would wake up feeling worthless; as If I wasn’t myself and didn’t want to go out and show myself. You don’t need makeup to feel good about yourself. I’m not saying don’t wear makeup because I for one wear it all the time but do it because it makes you self-assured, not just to impress others.

Personally, I made the decision of going out for a sorority; hoping this would benefit me in some positive way- indeed it did quite just that. I met my life-long sisters and newly best friends I can forever be grateful for. For this reason, I felt like I can be my true self around these girls and felt comfortable knowing I wouldn’t be judged. These girls looked at my inner beauty, not just what I portrayed on the outside, which made the whole sorority experience so much better.

Most importantly, I felt like for once I can feel good about myself and not worry about what anyone thinks of me.

To begin with, you should never let anyone opinion of you change your outlook on life and what you want to accomplish. As you get older, you will soon realize how important it is to focus on yourself, rather than worrying constantly how others view you.

Being confident starts with YOU, and when people see how strong and independent you are; that’s when you should be proud for never giving into anyone’s idea of what you should be. Also, when mentioned earlier by joining a sorority, or whether it be a club or organization - you can surround yourself with positive people who support you!

Nevertheless, being accepted and loved for who you are, no matter how you dress or how you act, is a way of gaining that confidence factor. Again I say, you need to be comfortable in the person you are while living your life the way you want to without anyone telling you can’t do so because you’re not good enough. You’re more then enough, and if those haters have a problem how happy and confident you’ve become, then there just jealous and you shouldn’t give them the time or day.

Whatever you do, go with heart, as well as being confident in the person you want to be. For this reason, your self-confidence should not depend on others, but solely on the fact that confidence comes with time. So be patient, because one day you will be so confident and try almost anything you thought you couldn’t do before.

As the great Demi Lovato once said, “what’s wrong with being confident” – so, in other words, confidence is key, and you should realize you are more than how you view yourself.

Sincerely,

A girl who forgot what being confident felt like