I'm a lesbian. Despite popular belief, yes, I have actually been this way since I was born. I am also a Christian.

I've been raised in Sunday school and have gone to church all my life, and now that I am an adult, I have decided for myself to adopt the beliefs and ways of Christianity. It wasn't always like this though.

In junior high, I finally accepted the fact that I was gay and was told things like, "You're going to hell." It sounded like knives in my ears and in my heart, but I believed it. Everything I had been taught and believed my whole life had been shattered. I was at a crossroads with God. I didn't believe He loved me, and therefore I wanted nothing to do with Him.

The next several years were pretty rocky for me. I tried relationships with guys. I tried to force myself to believe that I was something I wasn't. I became depressed, but I did my best to not let anyone see it. I was in and out of a couple of relationships that weren't the best. I did things to myself that I will always regret, but it was part of my journey that were crucial to learning forgiveness and self appreciation.

I was lost and looking for light, and I had no idea where to find it. All the way into my senior year of high school, I was blind. Despite the fact that I went to church and loved my church, I still didn't feel connected. I was constantly trying to convince myself that I had a real connection with God, but I knew I was lying to myself. I was still utterly lost and stumbling around in the kind of darkness that hurts your eyes.

Then, I hit the hardest bottom I'd ever hit in my life. (Truthfully, I thought I'd hit rock bottom before, but I knew this one was the real deal.) It was New Year's Eve, 2014, and everyone was off doing something and having fun. I was sitting on my bathroom floor sobbing. I was alone. I had never felt so alone in my entire life. I was panicking, and I was even considering the unthinkable...It was then I decided to text an old friend. I didn't really know why I had this sudden urge to talk to her in my moment of madness, but this was the moment God re-entered my life stronger and made me feel more alive than ever. There was a calmness that washed over my storm. She reminded me that God was with me, and would help to ease my pain if I asked Him for guidance.

I thought for a moment...

Wow, I guess He really didn't leave me...

In my moment of weakness, He knew that I was ready.

I continued talking to this friend and asking her for advice whenever I was scared or anxious, and each and every time, she reminded me of the wonderful person she and God knew I was. I mean for pete's sake, God created me in His own image, and even though He was there watching my every screwup, He never doubted my greatness even though I had failed Him. She turned me to God for every struggle I faced. I had never been in a relationship like this before with anyone. God was present in every part of the friendship.

Through this relationship I was able to reacquaint myself with 'My Creator.' I prayed all the time. I prayed about anything and everything. I started to look through 'The Word,' and I found guidance for everything that was ailing my soul. I actually began to form the one relationship I needed all my life. I finally found the one through whom I can do all things. I was reminded that God never stopped loving me at all; He was just waiting for me to be ready.

It has been a struggle, and I have learned that in order to grow, I must put my own effort into our relationship and not just rely on Him or others. It's an everyday thing, but every second with Him in my heart makes my life worth it. Through Jesus and with the help of the one who I am very proud to now call my best friend and truly amazing girlfriend, I learned to love the way He tells us to. I was even reminded how to love myself, because we are His creation He wants us to see ourselves through His eyes

I know God created me to be this way for a reason, and since I do not believe that He would create me to love someone that would make me sin against Him, I do not believe being a lesbian and being attracted to girls is a sin; however, I do understand that I fall short every day and must ask for forgiveness, and every time my soul is redeemed by the one I am eternally blessed to call my Father.

Yes, I still receive nasty comments, and yes, I have heard that it's impossible to be who God created me to be and still believe what I do, but I know that God is with me through all of that, and so I don't let it effect me because I know My Savior and He is with me. So, yes, I am a lesbian, but through my journey with God, I learned that I was so much more than that. My journey isn't over yet, but I hope this article influenced some of you to start your own. He is the only man I needin my life.