This year has already been a year of change for me. At the beginning of the new year, I decided this was going to be my "health year." And no, I am not just talking about making the typical resolution of "I am going to lose X amount of weight" or "I am going to join a gym and go every day." I am talking about the kind of health that contributes to my happiness and wellness. For example, I decided to start eating healthier. I decided to start exercising in some way shape or form every day. I decided to start journaling. I decided to start playing my guitar more. And lastly, I decided to see a counselor on a weekly bases.
That last one, if announced in a group setting might make people think I have something seriously wrong with me. I must be struggling with depression? I must need medication for some mental illness? I must be going through something hard during this time of my life? The answers to all those are "no" in my case. But, even if they were "yes" the opinion of society still would not have affected my decision to see a counselor and get help. The point here is even though I started attending counseling because sometimes I feel like sitting down and venting once a week might be healthier than keeping myself distracted all week and avoiding my feelings when things come up, doesn't mean I have mental health issues.
In fact, it means that I have my priorities straight and that I value my mental health before anything else in this world.
Adding to that at my counselors advising I made the decision to get a dog as an emotional support animal. I struggle with loneliness, anxiety at times, and a few other things that my emotional support animal helps me with and through.
My dog has been a handful. As a college student, I feel like I am raising a child. But at the same time, he has become my best friend, the one I am excited to see when I go home, the one that knows when I am not feeling good and doesn't leave my side. The one that cuddles with me on the couch and takes naps with me. The one that is always up for a spontaneous Target or TJ Maxx runs and doesn't mind my impulse buying. The one that is so happy to see me every time I walk in the door.
All these little things that this animal does for me help me maintain good mental health.
What bothers me is when we walk into a store, or an airport or any public place for that matter and he is wearing his vest, people stare. It's a different kind of stare. It's not the smile and "aw's" you get when people see a cute baby or puppy. It's the kind of stare that happens out of the corner of one's eye. The kind of stare that people think there must be something wrong with that girl so socializing with her might not be a good idea.
It's not the respectful kind of stare where they just assume my animal is at work and to not try to pet it. It's the opposite of that, the kind of stare that is the reason I have him in the first place.
Believe me, there are good people in the Targets, TJ Maxxes, and airports that approach me and always are so sweet when they ask "Is he working or can I pet him?" they then proceed to ask his name and make conversation with me. They then learn that I am just as mentally stable as they are that is why I have an ESA animal, to keep me that way. The same goes for therapy dogs. The rules, logistics, and regulations sometimes differ between ES Animals and Therapy dogs but the social rule still applies.
Stop treating people with Emotional Support Animals or Therapy dogs like they are under quarantine or have an infectious disease.
Stop staring at them in stores and judging them from a distance. Trust me when I say this, we can sense a judgemental person from aisles and miles away and so can our animal.
Also, next time you stare think about how much worse your judgemental stare is making that person feel about themselves. Think to yourself, instead of staring, what can I do to make this person feel good about themselves since it looks like they have a therapy dog? How can I compliment the dog and its behavior to make the owner feel accomplished and good about their furry friend? Those kinds of thing are the things we should be doing for people who have Emotional Support Animals & Therapy dogs.
Staring only makes you a bystander, not a world changer. Remember that.
To the ones being stared at, let them stare. Do a trick for them. Amaze them with your human abilities and let your animal amaze them with their behavior in public. You are doing great. Your dog is really stinkin' cute, and you are amazing and capable of so much more than what they are assuming.
There is nothing wrong with you darling, there is just everything wrong with the people staring.
Go into the store, get on that plane with your furry friend. Y'all look great together and it's admirable that y'all share such a strong bond its evident enough for people to stop and stare.
