I will admit that all through high school I absolutely dreaded having to write anything. Just thinking about how I have to write 500 plus words on a topic I don't care about at all only to get graded on it based on if the teacher liked it or not. No matter how hard I tried, my writing was never up to par with any of my teachers expectations. It really sucked. However, I always loved writing in a journal and I absolutely was in love with writing stories. When I was in 8th grade, I came up with the idea that I was going to write a book. I did start writing it, but I never got very far in it. And to this day, it sits less than a forth of the way finished on my laptop waiting for the day I decide that I am going to finish it. I don't know if that day will ever come, but I know that my love for writing never disappeared. If anything, it grew as I got older. I would sit in class and just think of new ideas for stories. I would come up with characters, their personality, different plots, basically anything you need to start writing. I did this all the time and I always would begin to write these stories but they never got very far.
I guess one main reason they never got very far is because I always think that they are never good enough. I mean I see books that have been published and popular stories that everyone reads and constantly compare them to mine. And no matter how proud I am of my own story in the beginning, I start to question whether it is good or not after I being to compare it to others. I have, over the years, learned to just accept that my story or my writing in general doesn't have to be just like everyone else's. I am my own person and I should be able to write about whatever I want and in whatever style I wish. Writing stories gave me the freedom to express myself in a way nothing else ever could. I started writing my own stories and I am hoping that they will continue and I won't give up because one day I want to be able to say that I have finished what I started.
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But, I guess another main reason that they never got finished is probably because I was never extremely passionate about it. I did like to journal and come up with my own stories, but constantly writing them down was a hassle especially since I tended to write them out by hand. And a lot of the time, when it came to writing stories, my brain came up with ideas faster than my hands could write so I would forget half of the things I just though so I would just give up at that point. It wasn't until this year when I began writing for Society19, that I really began to fall even more in love with writing. It gave me an outlet that nothing else did. If I didn’t feel motivated to do homework or I had nothing to do or I was feeling down or bored, I would write and it just began to make me so happy. I've never been more excited to write than I have been in the last 5 months and I think that is so amazing because I really enjoy it. My mom even told me that since I like writing so much that I should change my major to journalism. I won't be doing that, at least not anytime soon, but I will be continuing to write because it makes me happy and it is something that I want to do for the rest of my life. Even if the only person to ever read anything I write is me.
